Alicia Keys: 5 Ways to Overcome Self Doubt & Build Confidence Within
How do you handle negative self-talk?
What helps you overcome self-doubt?
Today, Jay sits down with Grammy Award-winning artist Alicia Keys as she shares her journey of self-discovery, resilience, and holistic living. Alicia founded Keys SoulCare, a skincare line emphasizing holistic well-being, and is a co-founder of the initiative She Is the Music, advocating for gender equality in the music industry. The conversation sheds light into Alicia's evolution from a young girl with dreams to an icon balancing a multifaceted career. Jay and Alicia discuss the highs and lows of fame, navigating self-doubt, and the pressures of public life, providing listeners with valuable insights on managing stress and fostering a positive self-image.
Alicia reflects on her childhood fears and the challenges of finding self-worth, candidly revealing how these experiences shaped her. She emphasizes the importance of staying grounded through practices like affirmations, journaling, and mindful rituals—habits that help her stay true to herself amid a whirlwind career.
Jay and Alicia then talk about the beauty of affirmations and the importance of letting go of perfectionism, a journey that led Alicia to adopt a more holistic approach to life. In her partnership with husband Swizz Beatz, she finds a harmonious balance of "flow" and "design," where they support each other's growth and freedom. This dynamic extends to their parenting style, where they teach their children gratitude and self-acceptance while instilling a sense of humility and grace.
In this interview, you'll learn:
How to Embrace Your True Self
How to Overcome Self-Doubt and Fear
How to Find Confidence Within Yourself
How to Turn Negative Thoughts into Positivity
How to Discover Your Inner Strength
How to Set Boundaries for Self-Care
How to Be Kind to Yourself
How to Trust Your Own Choices
The journey through self-doubt, fears, and external pressures highlights the importance of staying grounded, trusting intuition, and letting go of the need to seek others' approval.
With Love and Gratitude,
Jay Shetty
What We Discuss:
00:00 Intro
03:54 What Would You Say to Your Younger Self?
05:34 When You Have the Need to Protect Yourself
09:02 From Being Doubtful to Becoming Curious
13:43 What Is Your Affirmation Today?
15:30 Stop Being Mean to Yourself
19:06 Finding the Will to Love Your Own Skin
26:49 Spend More Time with Yourself
32:14 The Gifts and the Gaps
36:19 What Have You Learned From Your Partner?
38:06 Having Healthy Conflict in Your Relationship
45:53 Finding Balance Between Control and Flow
47:51 The Love for Crystals
51:32 Losing the Ability to Trust Yourself
57:15 What Are Your Go-To Rituals to Feel Better?
01:00:08 Teach Your Children to Practice Gratitude
01:03:45 Allow Other People to Speak and Just Listen
01:05:22 Creating Safe Space for Children
01:09:35 Hell’s Kitchen on Broadway
01:15:19 Be Clear with Your Vision
01:22:12 How Have You Protected Yourself from Fame and Success?
01:26:32 Alicia in Final Five
Episode Resources:
Alicia Keys | Website
Alicia Keys | YouTube
Alicia Keys | Instagram
Alicia Keys | Facebook
Alicia Keys | TikTok
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Speaker 1: I felt like I had to protect myself from being
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Speaker 1: hurt from people that I love. You got a special
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Speaker 1: guest to build a ninety million records soul.
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Speaker 2: Sixteen times a Grammy winning Resistant.
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Speaker 1: But Alicia Keys, You're going to get to that pole.
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Speaker 1: You see that light. After the pole, You're gonna get
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Speaker 1: to that light. You see that tree after the light,
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Speaker 1: You're going to get to that tree. And I discover
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Speaker 1: that that is how we get where we're going. If
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Speaker 1: it's something that you love, go after it because it's
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Speaker 1: meant for you.
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Speaker 2: The Number one health and Wellness Podcast, Jay Shetty Ja
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Speaker 2: Shetty See one Only Shed. Hey, everyone, welcome back to
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Speaker 2: on Purpose, the place you come to become the happier,
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Speaker 2: healthier and more healed. I'm so grateful for the amazing
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Speaker 2: conversations that I get to have, which are all about
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Speaker 2: human evolution, growth, purification, and cleansing. Today's guest is someone
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Speaker 2: who has talked about this at length in an amazing memoir,
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Speaker 2: in a document entries in so many forms, and today
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Speaker 2: I'm so excited that we finally have her on the
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Speaker 2: podcast in the flesh in person, although her voice and
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Speaker 2: her energy speaks through the microphone at any time. Today's
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Speaker 2: guest is the one, the only. Alisha Keys, a sixteen
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Speaker 2: time Grammy Award winning singer let Me say it Again,
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Speaker 2: sixteen time Grammy Award winning singer, songwriter, musician, producer, founder
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Speaker 2: of Key Soul Care, which you'll be hearing about today
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Speaker 2: New York Times best selling author, film, television and Broadway producer,
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Speaker 2: as well accomplished actress, entrepreneur, and a powerful force in
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Speaker 2: the world of activism. Alisha is one of the original
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Speaker 2: founders of She Is The Music, an initiative to create
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Speaker 2: change for women and build an equal future for music.
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Speaker 2: Alisha has sold over sixty five million records, over five
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Speaker 2: billion streams, and built an unparalleled repertoire of hits and accomplishments.
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Speaker 2: Hell's Kitchen, the thirteen time I'm Tony Award nominated original
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Speaker 2: stage musical. Alicia diligently worked for thirteen years to create
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Speaker 2: Open on Broadway at the Schubert Theater on April twentieth,
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Speaker 2: twenty twenty four. Today we're talking about Alicia's holistic beauty
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Speaker 2: and skincare line, Key Soul Care, which I can't wait
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Speaker 2: for you all to try. Welcome to On Purpose, Alicia
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Speaker 2: Keys that's so.
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Speaker 1: Weird, Like when you do all of that, there's something
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Speaker 1: about it that's just so fascinating and just wow, And
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Speaker 1: thank you for having me. And I can't believe we're
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Speaker 1: in a flesh for the first time on this show,
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Speaker 1: on this show, you know what I mean. This is
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Speaker 1: so good and I love your show and I love
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Speaker 1: your Your life's purpose is so beautiful. So thank you
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Speaker 1: for having me in your space. I'm loving this.
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Speaker 2: You've been so wonderful to me over the years. Honestly,
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Speaker 2: we've had such a sweet relationship whenever we've collaborated, and
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Speaker 2: from day one, you've always been so giving. But seeing
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Speaker 2: as you reacted to them that way, I wonder whether
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Speaker 2: little Alicia, if she saw that that was her life ahead,
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Speaker 2: what would have been her reaction if she heard all
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Speaker 2: of those things were going to happen in her life?
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Speaker 1: Like you lying, like you lying, right? I mean, you know,
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Speaker 1: as a kid, I really do remember having these dreams
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Speaker 1: and visions and desires and wishes. But you just don't
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Speaker 1: know what is going to come for you. You don't
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Speaker 1: know what's in your world or what's going to come
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Speaker 1: into your world. And I think a lot of times
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Speaker 1: we are built to doubt the possibilities for ourselves, and
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Speaker 1: so for self preservation and protection, we say, I mean,
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Speaker 1: it's probably not gonna be that way for me, or
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Speaker 1: you know, you know how it goes from you do
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Speaker 1: these things, and I remember doing these things, and it
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Speaker 1: wasn't until I stopped doing those things that things really
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Speaker 1: started to change. So I still have a piece of
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Speaker 1: insight of me that that is that little girl that's
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Speaker 1: kind of like, you know, you protect, you want to
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Speaker 1: protect what might go wrong, and so I find that
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Speaker 1: I do that sometimes, which maybe is what happened when
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Speaker 1: you just rattled off all those things, and I was
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Speaker 1: a little bit like, it's so crazy and weird and
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Speaker 1: strange and amazing at the same time.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, well, that's very relatable, I think for people to
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Speaker 2: hear that right now, to think that there was a
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Speaker 2: time in your life where doubts and anxiety and fear
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Speaker 2: would creep in. Further, it always exists for all of us,
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Speaker 2: but that it controlled a part of your life. What
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Speaker 2: were some of the doubts and fears and anxieties you
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Speaker 2: whether it was to life in general.
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Speaker 1: You know what I mean? About when you were out,
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Speaker 1: how about yesterday, you know what I mean, how about
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Speaker 1: like three days ago? Like as a kid growing up,
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Speaker 1: I think some of my fears really circulated around I
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Speaker 1: remember I felt I felt fear full that I wouldn't
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Speaker 1: that that was a that was a thing, and I
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Speaker 1: sense of lack that I was worried about. I was
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Speaker 1: I had to do a lot of work around that.
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Speaker 1: That was a lot. That was a big one, because
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Speaker 1: I mean, you really can perpetuate that cycle just simply
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Speaker 1: by the fact that you believe it can happen, you know,
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Speaker 1: And so that was a big one. I think that,
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Speaker 1: you know, there's a there's a lot of there's a
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Speaker 1: lot of fear or anxiety or worry around rejection. You know,
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Speaker 1: there was a lot of that, especially as I started
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Speaker 1: to become more some a public figure where people you know,
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Speaker 1: could kind of choose to like or dislike. There was
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Speaker 1: a it was. It's a difficult journey to understand that
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Speaker 1: you you're never gonna please everyone, period, and you're gonna
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Speaker 1: spend your all, you're gonna tear yourself apart trying to
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Speaker 1: like make sure every single thing is the way someone
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Speaker 1: else wants it to be. But I had a lot
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Speaker 1: of fear about that, and I really was. It was
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Speaker 1: a struggle for me and I, you know, I wanted
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Speaker 1: to be accepted. I wanted to be liked. I wanted
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Speaker 1: to be you know, I wanted to hear a positive
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Speaker 1: reflection back to me, you know, And so it took
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Speaker 1: a long time to kind of be like, yeah, I
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Speaker 1: don't I can't depend on that, you know. I have
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Speaker 1: to find my own stability. I have to find my
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Speaker 1: own intuition. I have to find what I believe in,
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Speaker 1: and at least I can stand on that. At least
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Speaker 1: I can say I.
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Speaker 2: Really believe that one.
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Speaker 1: You know, if it didn't work out, but I really
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Speaker 1: believed it, and I'm proud of it, you know what
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Speaker 1: I mean. And that's a big one, you know, talk
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Speaker 1: about even yesterday, I mean Hell's Kitchen, where we talked
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Speaker 1: about Hell's Kitchen, which is my musical, which has been
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Speaker 1: a big dream in the making. There were moments where
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Speaker 1: I'm like, is this gonna work? Like, what if the
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Speaker 1: whole I have this whole vision, I know what I want,
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Speaker 1: But what if for some reason, the whole thing doesn't
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Speaker 1: go the way I want? What does that mean? I mean,
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Speaker 1: you have many, many, many dollars, You have investors that
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Speaker 1: you promised them to trust you. Can I carry this?
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Speaker 1: Can I hold this? Can I manifest this? Terrifying? I
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Speaker 1: mean I would speak to my kids about it just
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Speaker 1: because I wanted them to know that it's scary. You know,
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Speaker 1: it's scary to dream. But does that mean I'm not
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Speaker 1: gonna dream it. I'm not gonna try it?
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Speaker 2: No, I have to.
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Speaker 1: So tons of things have been that I.
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Speaker 2: Feel like so many people who are listening right now
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Speaker 2: would say, at least I feel the same way. I
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Speaker 2: talk to myself in my head and I think I
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Speaker 2: can't do it. I'm not meant for it. It's it's
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Speaker 2: not gonna happen for me. And at the same time,
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Speaker 2: they have this voice inside of them that says, you're
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Speaker 2: made for more, You're made of more. I know I
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Speaker 2: need to believe in myself and we kind of feel
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Speaker 2: this internal battle. How did you What was the work
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Speaker 2: you had to do in order to go from someone
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Speaker 2: who was anxious, doubtful to become someone who manifested this beautiful, incredible,
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Speaker 2: full life. Not that it's easy that it came immediately,
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Speaker 2: but what was the work in the beginning stages that
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Speaker 2: you had to reorient your mind?
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Speaker 1: That's a great question. I think one of the things
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Speaker 1: that I had to come to terms with is that
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Speaker 1: pretty much nothing is going to come in the time
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Speaker 1: frame that you think is going to come. So that's
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Speaker 1: and that's helpful because I think a lot of us
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Speaker 1: are you know. I mean, we're in such a digital
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Speaker 1: space and we see all these things, and we're bombarded
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Speaker 1: with all these images, and we're bombarded with all these
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Speaker 1: kind of like carefully crafted posts of perfection, and you
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Speaker 1: get freaked out about it. Right, But I'm you know,
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Speaker 1: and fortunately I didn't really have to grow up looking
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Speaker 1: at that, so I empathize deeply with this generation. We
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Speaker 1: have to evolve as young people on a whole other level.
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Speaker 1: Then I even had to navigate. But what I mean
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Speaker 1: by and why it relates is I did I felt
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Speaker 1: like I've grew up in New York City. Everybody's a hustler.
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Speaker 1: You gotta go fast, you gotta make it happen. You
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Speaker 1: gotta stay up all night and get up cracking dawn.
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Speaker 1: And it's not gonna happen if you don't. And I realized, wait,
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Speaker 1: you know, as hard as I try to push the
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Speaker 1: thing forward, when it's time, it's time. And if it's
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Speaker 1: not time, it don't matter what I do. It doesn't
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Speaker 1: no matter how much sleep I don't get, it's not
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Speaker 1: going to be time until it's time. And so I
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Speaker 1: think that that steadiness of like kind of you just
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Speaker 1: have to put one foot in front of the other,
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Speaker 1: is just as simple as that. And I remember when
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Speaker 1: I did my first marathon. I ran in Greece, and
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Speaker 1: I figured I'd never do another marathon, so I might
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Speaker 1: as well do something forgettable. But I could. I couldn't
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Speaker 1: figure out how it's gonna make it. Everything hurt, my
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Speaker 1: feet hurt, my back hurt, my lower back hurt, my
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Speaker 1: abs hurt, my body ached, and I couldn't figure out
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Speaker 1: how am I gonna get there? And I remember I
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Speaker 1: was running with my friend who trained with me and
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Speaker 1: helped me, and he said, you see that pole, You're
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Speaker 1: gonna get to that pole. You see that light after
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Speaker 1: the pole, you're gonna get to that light. You see
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Speaker 1: that tree after the light, You're gonna get to that tree.
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Speaker 1: And it was literally that, step by step, and so
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Speaker 1: I discovered that that is how we get where we're going,
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Speaker 1: like this increment of small, determined moments. And so I
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Speaker 1: think that as well as coupled with taking that negative
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Speaker 1: talk out of your space, like being very conscious it happens,
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Speaker 1: it's in your head, you hear it, You're like tell
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Speaker 1: yourself the opposite thing. I mean, that's how I started
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Speaker 1: to really get into affirmations, which I realized that I
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Speaker 1: had to create what I wanted to hear. And oftentimes
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Speaker 1: it's so many times it's the barrage of everyone else's
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Speaker 1: doubts and fears. And your parents, you inherited theirs, and
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Speaker 1: you inherited all your peers things, and you got all
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Speaker 1: these things insiety, they're not even yours. And so I
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Speaker 1: had to create this connection with affirmations that allowed me
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Speaker 1: to say what I wanted to hear. And so I
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Speaker 1: had to become very mindful to notice the negative so
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Speaker 1: that I could replace it. And when I did that.
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Speaker 1: It really changed everything. It changed a bunch and I
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Speaker 1: had to stop saying things that I heard my mother say.
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Speaker 1: I had to stop saying things that I heard whoever
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Speaker 1: else I trusted say, because it wasn't serving me, because
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Speaker 1: she had picked up some stuff that I didn't need
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Speaker 1: to pick up. I didn't need to hold it. Stuff
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Speaker 1: like that has been How how many marathings have you done? Now,
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Speaker 1: I've done too. A di Greece and I did New York.
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Speaker 2: Wow.
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Speaker 1: And I realized the craziest thing. I realized that what
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Speaker 1: I was experiencing, that ache, that pain, that lower back,
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Speaker 1: and I think it was childbirth.
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Speaker 2: Oh.
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Speaker 1: I didn't know that because the first time I hadn't
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Speaker 1: given birth. But when I gave birth, I recognized the
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Speaker 1: sensations and it was similar to a marathon.
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Speaker 2: Wow.
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Speaker 1: It was kind of crazy, but there was a strength
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Speaker 1: there that, you know, was really empowering. So only two.
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Speaker 1: My brother's trying to get me do another one. I'm like, nah, be,
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Speaker 1: I'm not doing it.
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Speaker 2: My wife'stard in London this year for the first time
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Speaker 2: she's been training.
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Speaker 1: It's cool when you do it, it's phenomenal and you
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Speaker 1: really you really discover that it's that your mind is
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Speaker 1: stronger than your physical being, and you really can find
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Speaker 1: this place that you didn't know you could.
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Speaker 2: Absolutely. What was your affirmation this morning? Mmm?
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Speaker 1: My affirmation depends on the day, right, So today my
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Speaker 1: affirmation is just I'm going to be on time because
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Speaker 1: I struggle to get my kids to school on time.
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Speaker 1: It's killing me. My my youngest son has just changed
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Speaker 1: schools and he's going to another, so so now I'm
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Speaker 1: taking both kids to two separate places. I'm struggling. And
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Speaker 1: my second affirmation is I forgive myself. It's okay, like grace,
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Speaker 1: have grace with yourself. You're trying your best. It's not
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Speaker 1: like you're messing around and doing whatever. You're really trying
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Speaker 1: your best and you're gonna figure out the rhythm of
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Speaker 1: this thing. Have some grace.
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Speaker 2: I love those. They're so practical. I think all of
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Speaker 2: us can do all of them right. They're great. Yeah,
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Speaker 2: And the time one's funny because it rends with my mom.
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Speaker 2: My mom had to do the same for me and
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Speaker 2: my sister because all boys schools, you're into an old
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Speaker 2: girls school, and so my mom would have to drop
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Speaker 2: her and then drop me all the other way around.
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Speaker 2: Sometimes it is it's.
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Speaker 1: More than a notion. You think I could do this
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Speaker 1: if I just leave by this time, and for whatever reason,
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Speaker 1: that time comes and goes over and over. So it's
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Speaker 1: all good.
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Speaker 2: But I love how simple that is. Like I think
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Speaker 2: a lot of people all think affirmations always have to
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Speaker 2: be this profound, like incredible statement, and you're like, it's
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Speaker 2: just to be on time, and it's to forgive myself
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Speaker 2: And that's so real because we need to forgive ourselves
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Speaker 2: every day.
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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's okay, it's okay, it's really okay. So you know,
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Speaker 1: because you want the best, you want the best for yourself,
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Speaker 1: you want the best for your family, you want the
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Speaker 1: best outcome, you know, and it all comes from a
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Speaker 1: good place. But I think sometimes we can beat ourselves
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Speaker 1: up so badly about things that you know, we can
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Speaker 1: just give ourselves a little bit of a break and
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Speaker 1: we can start again and try again.
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Speaker 2: And Okay, what was the last thing you beat yourself
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Speaker 2: up about really badly where you were like, I really
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Speaker 2: made myself feel comfortable, you.
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Speaker 1: Know, I really try not to do that. I really do,
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Speaker 1: Like I really I feel like I have a pretty
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Speaker 1: good sense of self and I feel like I have
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Speaker 1: a pretty good sense also of like reality, and so
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Speaker 1: I don't over obsess and I don't over kind of like,
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Speaker 1: I'm not overly mean to myself. But I did think
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Speaker 1: about that the other day and I did I did this.
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Speaker 1: I didn't put it up yet, but I did this.
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Speaker 1: I do these things called piece of piece and and
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Speaker 1: I call this speak to me nice, because you're not
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Speaker 1: gonna let someone else talk to you just any type
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Speaker 1: of way. You're like, excuse me, how did you just
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Speaker 1: you just speak to me nice? But you yourself will
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Speaker 1: speak to yourself in these crazy ways. And so I
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Speaker 1: kind of was like just reflecting on you telling yourself,
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Speaker 1: me telling myself speak to me nice, like talk to
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Speaker 1: me with kindness and love. I learned that from my
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Speaker 1: son a lot, because my youngest he is he's he's like,
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Speaker 1: there's a little tough on himself, and I'm like, hey,
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Speaker 1: speak to yourself nice. And so I think that is
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Speaker 1: something that that I've learned how to embody. And I
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Speaker 1: really try not to spin out too much, but you know,
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Speaker 1: there are times of course you just you know you,
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Speaker 1: but I'm like this is really doing no good. I'm
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Speaker 1: really freaking out, and I was just like, why what
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Speaker 1: are we doing in this space in this cycle? Sometimes
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Speaker 1: you got to freak out, though, Yeah, because you got
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Speaker 1: to learn something from it. You have to like take
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Speaker 1: away whatever that is or that energy or that person
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Speaker 1: who's spinning you like that, or that trigger that's triggering
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Speaker 1: you like that, and you do have to kind of
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Speaker 1: spin out just to be like WHOA that actually gets
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Speaker 1: to me a lot why I've been learning a lot
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Speaker 1: of that too.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, there's a I always like to remind people that
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Speaker 2: guilt blocks growth, and shame doesn't help you shift, and
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Speaker 2: judgment doesn't help you transform. Guilt blocks growth completely. It
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Speaker 2: makes you wallow more in your guilt, and shame makes
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Speaker 2: you feel stuck and shackled by it. Yes, and transformation
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Speaker 2: is stunted when we're not able to be nice, kind,
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Speaker 2: give ourselves grace. And it's funny because we all think
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Speaker 2: we can guild ourselves into moving. But I kill myself enough,
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Speaker 2: then maybe.
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Speaker 1: I'll change, I'll be motivated.
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Speaker 2: Maybe maybe you will for like a couple of days,
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Speaker 2: but over time it runs out. If you shame yourself
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Speaker 2: into change, maybe for a couple of days you'll eat better,
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Speaker 2: work out more. Whatever it is that you have your
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Speaker 2: personal challenges with but it's not sustainable, Like shame and
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Speaker 2: guilt are not sustainable emotions and they run out of
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Speaker 2: steam very quickly. And I was thinking about something that
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Speaker 2: you've spoken about before, is your journey with your own skin,
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Speaker 2: and like how you've had skin anxiety. And I know
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Speaker 2: at one point you went completely like no makeup at
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Speaker 2: one period of time in your life. And then now
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Speaker 2: of course you have this. You know, you're in the
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Speaker 2: beauty industry now as well, and you really care about
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Speaker 2: how people care about their internal and the casing that
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Speaker 2: we all have. And I know that you, you know,
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Speaker 2: live a conscious, spirited life, which I really want to
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Speaker 2: dive into. But I think often those of us who
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Speaker 2: live spirit your lives, we can be quite negligent of
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Speaker 2: our casing and of this body, and you can.
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Speaker 1: You can kind of disconnect, disconnect from it.
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Speaker 2: Yeah, disconnect from it right right. And so I wanted
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Speaker 2: to ask you, how is your relationship changed with your skin?
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Speaker 2: That was something that brought you anxiety?
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Speaker 1: Oh, my gosh, I confident in skin. I mean it
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Speaker 1: was forever, it was literally forever that I really struggled
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Speaker 1: with my with my skin. And you know you're a
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Speaker 1: teenager and your hormones and you get it and it's cool.
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Speaker 1: And then all of a sudden, I was like eighteen,
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Speaker 1: and then I was twenty three, and then I was
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Speaker 1: twenty eight, and then I was thirty, and then I
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Speaker 1: was like thirty five, and I'm like, WHOA, when does
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Speaker 1: this thing stop? Like when I thought like sixteen, eighteen,
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Speaker 1: twenty one, maybe why is it continuing? And it was
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Speaker 1: really hard to especially to be in spaces where you
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Speaker 1: would present yourself and you would feel just so self
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Speaker 1: can I just felt so self conscious and I'm like,
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Speaker 1: but there's a big bump right here, And then most
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Speaker 1: people are like, I don't even see the damn bump.
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Speaker 1: But I see the bump right here, and it's huge,
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Speaker 1: and it feels really uncomfortable. You know, you just feel uncomfortable.
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Speaker 1: You want to know why too, You want to know
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Speaker 1: what's the matter? Is something wrong? Why? I thought, I'm
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Speaker 1: what can I do to help this? And so that
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Speaker 1: definitely caused me a lot of anxiety. I started in
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Speaker 1: the music world when I was eighteen, and so that
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Speaker 1: was right kind of at the precipice, and then the
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Speaker 1: stress of the whole universe of music was just so much,
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Speaker 1: and I was trying my best to play it cool
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Speaker 1: and like I can handle it.
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Speaker 2: I can do it.
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Speaker 1: But it was stressful. It was a whole new world.
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Speaker 1: I had to carry a new weight on my shoulders
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Speaker 1: and try to you know, kind of like be calm
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Speaker 1: while or cool while doing it, and it was tricky
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Speaker 1: and my skin. I learned that my body react to stress.
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Speaker 1: Our bodies react to stress. My personal body physically reacts
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Speaker 1: to stress. Many of our personal bodies do this, which
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Speaker 1: is obviously why even many diseases come to us from stress,
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Speaker 1: because physically, it's a physical manifestation of this feeling, which
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Speaker 1: is why it is so important for us to figure out,
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Speaker 1: like what gives you peace, what calms you down, what
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Speaker 1: makes you feel safe and like you're in your skin
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Speaker 1: and you're yourself and these type of things. And so
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Speaker 1: of course I didn't know what that was for a
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Speaker 1: long time, but I realized that it was these relationships
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Speaker 1: I was attracting, and it was the you know, the
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Speaker 1: level of commitment I was agreeing to that left no
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Speaker 1: space for me to reflect, or to sleep, or to
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Speaker 1: be with my friends. And you know, do those have
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Speaker 1: those outlets that do give you a sense of calm,
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Speaker 1: and so my skin was so reactive that I said,
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Speaker 1: one day to myself, if I one day I'm going
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Speaker 1: to make something that fixes this, this, I'm gonna do
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Speaker 1: something about this, because I know I'm not the only one.
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Speaker 1: And I realized as I began to you know, live
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Speaker 1: and experience so many different parts of my life, motherhood
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Speaker 1: and you know, raising young kids and finding time for
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Speaker 1: yourself really and getting rid of those toxic energies that
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Speaker 1: were attacking me in real life. I realized that you
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Speaker 1: really have to take care of your soul, like like
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Speaker 1: you have to take care of your soul. So this
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Speaker 1: philosophy of soul care really came from all of these
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Speaker 1: understandings and all of these realizings that no one's going
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Speaker 1: to do it for me. Like no, as much as
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Speaker 1: I really really wish someone would stand up and be
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Speaker 1: like you, you're not good for her, get out of here,
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Speaker 1: that thing you you need to stop, No, I have
412
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:04,240
Speaker 1: to be the judge of that. And therefore I have
413
00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:07,119
Speaker 1: to find my way to the understanding of how do
414
00:22:07,240 --> 00:22:10,119
Speaker 1: I hear myself to know what is good and what
415
00:22:10,280 --> 00:22:11,960
Speaker 1: is not, or what is real or what is true?
416
00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:14,840
Speaker 1: And so There were many things that brought me to
417
00:22:14,960 --> 00:22:17,800
Speaker 1: that place. Some of them were meditations that brought me
418
00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:20,359
Speaker 1: there and really brought me to a more intuitive space.
419
00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:24,000
Speaker 1: Some of them were just practicing the art of like, no,
420
00:22:24,720 --> 00:22:30,159
Speaker 1: what do you think? No, I know six friends said this, Well,
421
00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:32,800
Speaker 1: I know that very strong energy that always tells everybody
422
00:22:32,880 --> 00:22:35,720
Speaker 1: what they think, said this, but what do you think?
423
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:40,200
Speaker 1: And that became the practice of soul care, and also
424
00:22:40,280 --> 00:22:44,800
Speaker 1: these ideas of ancient rituals and what are some special
425
00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:47,639
Speaker 1: ways that we can have peace and calm? And I
426
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:50,960
Speaker 1: was attracted to crystals and their powers and their meanings.
427
00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:53,639
Speaker 1: I was attracted to journaling. And I have a very
428
00:22:53,720 --> 00:22:56,120
Speaker 1: difficult time as a kid. I had a difficult time
429
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:59,840
Speaker 1: expressing my truth. And I realized that when I would
430
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:02,320
Speaker 1: ernal or do the stream of consciousness I could. I
431
00:23:02,359 --> 00:23:04,320
Speaker 1: could actually just release it. I could let it go.
432
00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:06,040
Speaker 1: And if I'm not good at doing that to someone
433
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:09,639
Speaker 1: else because I didn't trust as fully, I can do
434
00:23:09,720 --> 00:23:12,480
Speaker 1: it with myself, you know. And so these practices of
435
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:14,520
Speaker 1: how do you kind of like depend on yourself to
436
00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:18,280
Speaker 1: find your own grounding became my idea of what soul
437
00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:22,479
Speaker 1: care is, which eventually became how I said I'm going
438
00:23:22,560 --> 00:23:25,960
Speaker 1: to make that thing to fix that thing became this
439
00:23:26,240 --> 00:23:29,119
Speaker 1: key soul care, And the idea is, to me, it's
440
00:23:29,119 --> 00:23:31,520
Speaker 1: a philosophy, it's a way of life. It's a lifestyle
441
00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:36,240
Speaker 1: to me, you know. You know, the beauty industry or
442
00:23:36,720 --> 00:23:40,359
Speaker 1: the skincare industry, just like the music industry, all of
443
00:23:40,440 --> 00:23:44,800
Speaker 1: it is kind of creating how to live within the chaos.
444
00:23:45,119 --> 00:23:47,800
Speaker 1: And so how do we do it? Nobody teaches us.
445
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:51,960
Speaker 1: Normally it's a blessing if someone does, but normally it's
446
00:23:52,000 --> 00:23:56,680
Speaker 1: not so finding these ways through affirmations, through the idea
447
00:23:56,840 --> 00:24:00,439
Speaker 1: of really connecting to yourself and using the affirm are
448
00:24:00,480 --> 00:24:03,320
Speaker 1: on every battle. Because the idea is you ash your face.
449
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:05,879
Speaker 1: You do that every day with the golden cleanser. You
450
00:24:05,960 --> 00:24:08,399
Speaker 1: can also think about how I'm devoted to this moment
451
00:24:08,680 --> 00:24:11,680
Speaker 1: because so many times we're over here, over there, back there.
452
00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:14,640
Speaker 1: How can you just be right here with yourself right now?
453
00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:17,520
Speaker 1: And so the idea is like creating this mixture of
454
00:24:17,560 --> 00:24:21,720
Speaker 1: ancient rituals and we're skin meets soul and sole care
455
00:24:21,760 --> 00:24:24,040
Speaker 1: because we have air care, hair care, and nail care,
456
00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:27,600
Speaker 1: body care, home care, but we never had soul care.
457
00:24:28,280 --> 00:24:31,399
Speaker 1: Why so I want to start it.
458
00:24:31,920 --> 00:24:34,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so beautiful. I mean, I couldn't agree more.
459
00:24:34,800 --> 00:24:38,560
Speaker 2: As someone who was very negligent of a lot of
460
00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:41,200
Speaker 2: this stuff like growing up and not really thinking about it,
461
00:24:41,400 --> 00:24:45,439
Speaker 2: I've seen the value of I'm a big fan of affirmations, right.
462
00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:50,760
Speaker 2: I think, even when it comes to cleansing my face,
463
00:24:51,000 --> 00:24:54,080
Speaker 2: what that means, what that feels like, how different I
464
00:24:54,160 --> 00:24:56,720
Speaker 2: feel internally because of it, How it can be a
465
00:24:56,800 --> 00:25:00,359
Speaker 2: reminder to continue to cleanse and detox the soul as
466
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:04,359
Speaker 2: well as that which is around me. There's so much
467
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:08,240
Speaker 2: of that connection from body, mind, spirit, and soul that
468
00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:10,919
Speaker 2: that I think we lose and we don't realize how
469
00:25:11,000 --> 00:25:13,399
Speaker 2: interconnected they all are. Well, you were saying about stress,
470
00:25:13,440 --> 00:25:17,640
Speaker 2: I found really powerful because so for me, my stress
471
00:25:17,760 --> 00:25:20,400
Speaker 2: shows up as tightness in my body, like I feel
472
00:25:20,440 --> 00:25:22,920
Speaker 2: my stress is like it gets stored in my neck
473
00:25:23,119 --> 00:25:25,880
Speaker 2: or my shoulders, and then I'm just feeling tight. Even
474
00:25:25,960 --> 00:25:28,320
Speaker 2: though I was like, I didn't know I was stressed,
475
00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 2: I didn't know what I was going through. And as
476
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 2: you're saying, for some people it shows up in their skin.
477
00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:34,720
Speaker 2: I was going to ask you, there's a bit of
478
00:25:34,800 --> 00:25:38,639
Speaker 2: an addiction. We also have to stress and drama and
479
00:25:39,400 --> 00:25:42,359
Speaker 2: there's this feeling sometimes where we prefer it when we
480
00:25:42,560 --> 00:25:46,560
Speaker 2: have stress and busyness, and we're workaholics and we like
481
00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:49,120
Speaker 2: the drama, and almost when there's peace, we almost get
482
00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:53,280
Speaker 2: confused and lost because the exactly we get scared, right, So,
483
00:25:54,080 --> 00:25:56,960
Speaker 2: what would you say to someone who's actually they'd listen
484
00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:58,680
Speaker 2: to us right now and they're like, wow, I just
485
00:25:58,760 --> 00:26:02,359
Speaker 2: realized that that's why I am. I actually like I
486
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:04,560
Speaker 2: choose stress. Because do you.
487
00:26:04,600 --> 00:26:06,640
Speaker 1: Think people come to that realization.
488
00:26:06,840 --> 00:26:09,360
Speaker 2: I don't think people do it consciously, but I think
489
00:26:09,560 --> 00:26:13,040
Speaker 2: unconsciously when I sit with people, they'll find that their
490
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:18,880
Speaker 2: inherited choice is to naturally stay busy, work a lot,
491
00:26:20,280 --> 00:26:23,480
Speaker 2: create drama in their relationship, whatever it is, because we're
492
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:26,119
Speaker 2: more used to it, not because we're bad people or
493
00:26:26,240 --> 00:26:30,280
Speaker 2: because we're wrong, but because we kind of feel familiar.
494
00:26:31,960 --> 00:26:33,680
Speaker 2: And I'll give you the opposite example. I have lots
495
00:26:33,680 --> 00:26:35,159
Speaker 2: of friends who will be like, oh, I'm dating this
496
00:26:35,240 --> 00:26:38,080
Speaker 2: guy and it's really peaceful on board, and so there's
497
00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:41,560
Speaker 2: that right where people actually have like peace and stillness
498
00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:46,800
Speaker 2: and connection. We're like, yeah, yeah, there's nothing to talk about.
499
00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:49,399
Speaker 2: So I don't think it's something that people do on purpose.
500
00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:51,520
Speaker 2: And I don't think it's something that people even do
501
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:53,880
Speaker 2: it consciously, but I think we do like to stay
502
00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:57,679
Speaker 2: busy and stressed to some degree. Hey everyone, it's Jay
503
00:26:57,760 --> 00:27:01,359
Speaker 2: Schatty and I'm thrilled to announce myst Tour. For the
504
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Speaker 2: first time ever, you can see my On Purpose podcast
505
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506
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507
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510
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Speaker 2: see you there. Tickets are on cell now, head to
511
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Speaker 2: Jayshetty dot me and get yours today. Okay, I am
512
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Speaker 2: so excited about this because we've got the first ever
513
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Speaker 2: merch drop for On Purpose. It's finally here and for
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Speaker 2: world mental health Today, We're doing an exclusive limited edition
515
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Speaker 2: drop with all the proceeds going to the National Alliance
516
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Speaker 2: on Mental Illness NAMI. So now you can wear your
517
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Speaker 2: On Purpose merch, listen to the podcast and know that
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Speaker 2: you two are having an impact. I want to thank
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Speaker 2: you so much in advance. I can't wait to see
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Speaker 2: all of your pictures wearing the merch, the sweatshirts, hot
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522
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:17,600
Speaker 2: That's jshettishop dot com. And remember one hundred percent of
523
00:28:17,680 --> 00:28:19,280
Speaker 2: the proceeds go to NAMI.
524
00:28:20,520 --> 00:28:23,479
Speaker 1: I am familiar with that as well, and I'm kind
525
00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:24,960
Speaker 1: of was just telling you that I had the best
526
00:28:25,000 --> 00:28:28,680
Speaker 1: summer and it was my first summer where you know,
527
00:28:28,760 --> 00:28:30,879
Speaker 1: the last two summers I was on tour and obviously
528
00:28:30,920 --> 00:28:33,879
Speaker 1: those are just such a monster universe to try to
529
00:28:34,000 --> 00:28:36,960
Speaker 1: like harness, and this summer was just like I was like,
530
00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:40,200
Speaker 1: I am creating peace this summer. I am doing the
531
00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:43,160
Speaker 1: things that everything I can imagine I want to do,
532
00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:46,240
Speaker 1: I'm doing it this summer. And it was really liberating,
533
00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:51,040
Speaker 1: really liberating. But it also does reflect to myself back
534
00:28:51,080 --> 00:28:55,880
Speaker 1: to your point, the connection to the busyness equaling success
535
00:28:56,120 --> 00:29:04,240
Speaker 1: or the busyness equaling you know, something positive, when surely
536
00:29:04,320 --> 00:29:07,240
Speaker 1: there's positivity there for sure, But there is an addiction
537
00:29:07,680 --> 00:29:10,680
Speaker 1: that I think comes with this idea of having to
538
00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:14,080
Speaker 1: fill every minute and fill every second. And also there's
539
00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 1: the avoidance that we're all likely experiencing where we don't
540
00:29:18,800 --> 00:29:21,400
Speaker 1: really want to face all the things underneath the things.
541
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:24,560
Speaker 1: So if we stay as busy as possible, we are
542
00:29:24,800 --> 00:29:27,840
Speaker 1: like literally we don't even have time to think about
543
00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:30,680
Speaker 1: those things or to reflect on those things. And so
544
00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:33,840
Speaker 1: I do understand that lifestyle because I feel like for
545
00:29:34,120 --> 00:29:37,640
Speaker 1: quite a while, I didn't even I would just say
546
00:29:37,840 --> 00:29:43,480
Speaker 1: yes because I'm used to saying yes, yes, right, And
547
00:29:44,720 --> 00:29:48,040
Speaker 1: I realized, wait, okay, you don't have to say yes.
548
00:29:48,720 --> 00:29:51,320
Speaker 1: So do you want to say yes? Do you actually
549
00:29:51,400 --> 00:29:54,560
Speaker 1: want to say yes, or do you just feel obligated
550
00:29:54,640 --> 00:29:57,240
Speaker 1: to say yes for any number of reasons. So I
551
00:29:57,280 --> 00:30:01,400
Speaker 1: think it's very powerful. I think you're right totally. The
552
00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:08,720
Speaker 1: drama that we are, we've been conditioned.
553
00:30:09,440 --> 00:30:10,880
Speaker 2: That's why I would right to.
554
00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:17,360
Speaker 1: It's around us, it's what we see every day. We've
555
00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:21,480
Speaker 1: seen our parents experience it in different ways. We've seen
556
00:30:21,560 --> 00:30:25,640
Speaker 1: our friends go through it in different ways, and therefore
557
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:30,120
Speaker 1: that becomes the normal for us, and when we kind
558
00:30:30,160 --> 00:30:33,640
Speaker 1: of crave it, we become addicted to it even without
559
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:36,360
Speaker 1: knowing it. So I think that practice of like that
560
00:30:36,640 --> 00:30:39,200
Speaker 1: that perhaps is one of the opening When you said,
561
00:30:39,200 --> 00:30:41,360
Speaker 1: how did you get to a place where you could,
562
00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:44,840
Speaker 1: you know, find yourself in a where you are? I
563
00:30:44,920 --> 00:30:47,840
Speaker 1: think part of that practice really did have to come
564
00:30:48,000 --> 00:30:51,080
Speaker 1: to spending time with myself, and I made every excuse
565
00:30:51,120 --> 00:30:53,040
Speaker 1: why I could spend time so my kids. I can't
566
00:30:53,080 --> 00:30:55,160
Speaker 1: do it. My kids, you know, I can't leave them
567
00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:57,280
Speaker 1: by themselves. I can't do it because I got to
568
00:30:57,360 --> 00:30:59,200
Speaker 1: you know, who else is going to do. I got
569
00:30:59,320 --> 00:31:02,240
Speaker 1: to feed the family, you know, we gotta do and
570
00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:05,600
Speaker 1: they all seem valid. Makes sense to me, Yeah, that's true.
571
00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:06,000
Speaker 2: Your kids.
572
00:31:06,040 --> 00:31:08,320
Speaker 1: You should probably make sure your kids are good. And
573
00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:12,400
Speaker 1: if I don't make sure I'm good, how can I
574
00:31:12,440 --> 00:31:16,000
Speaker 1: make sure anybody is good? Ever, And so spending time
575
00:31:16,080 --> 00:31:19,920
Speaker 1: with myself was I fought against it so much, but
576
00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:22,400
Speaker 1: when I started to do it, I realized that I
577
00:31:22,600 --> 00:31:27,160
Speaker 1: was more powerful than i'd ever been, and I was faster.
578
00:31:27,760 --> 00:31:31,000
Speaker 1: I was able to do things quicker and more efficiently
579
00:31:31,600 --> 00:31:35,240
Speaker 1: because I was so cloudy, you know, And that was cool.
580
00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:37,920
Speaker 1: That was cool when you start to feel that where
581
00:31:37,960 --> 00:31:41,360
Speaker 1: you're like, oh, I don't have to spend so much
582
00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:44,960
Speaker 1: time doing whatever action because I actually know what I
583
00:31:45,040 --> 00:31:48,960
Speaker 1: want to do blah blah blah blah, and I'm decisive. Man.
584
00:31:49,080 --> 00:31:51,720
Speaker 1: I felt so good. I had never felt decisive before
585
00:31:51,720 --> 00:31:56,000
Speaker 1: in my life. I'd never felt clear, without thousands of
586
00:31:56,080 --> 00:32:00,840
Speaker 1: other opinions, I never felt like my own self, so
587
00:32:01,040 --> 00:32:03,840
Speaker 1: that was big. But spending time with myself was I
588
00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:05,760
Speaker 1: believe one of the keys to that.
589
00:32:06,160 --> 00:32:08,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, when I'm hearing you talk about how much we
590
00:32:09,040 --> 00:32:11,320
Speaker 2: have to filter from the outside world, you mentioned a
591
00:32:11,400 --> 00:32:14,080
Speaker 2: few times your parents, people's parents, like a lot of
592
00:32:14,480 --> 00:32:16,160
Speaker 2: a lot comes from our parents. And I know you
593
00:32:16,240 --> 00:32:18,400
Speaker 2: spoke about so beautifully in your book that I got
594
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:20,920
Speaker 2: to interview about, which I love that. It was such
595
00:32:20,960 --> 00:32:24,280
Speaker 2: a it is such a beautiful memoir that you wrote
596
00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:27,480
Speaker 2: a few years back. And I was wondering what I
597
00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:30,280
Speaker 2: always think about our parents giving us gifts and gaps,
598
00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:33,560
Speaker 2: and we give us certain gifts and they leave certain gaps,
599
00:32:34,360 --> 00:32:36,760
Speaker 2: and we end up spending our whole life trying to
600
00:32:36,800 --> 00:32:39,280
Speaker 2: get other people to fill those gaps and give us
601
00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:42,360
Speaker 2: the same gifts, and it creates a lot of good
602
00:32:42,400 --> 00:32:44,360
Speaker 2: things and issues. So I was going to ask you,
603
00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:46,280
Speaker 2: what would you say the gifts you got from your
604
00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:48,520
Speaker 2: mother and father and what were the gaps that they
605
00:32:48,640 --> 00:32:50,239
Speaker 2: left and how did they affect you? Oo?
606
00:32:51,280 --> 00:32:54,880
Speaker 1: Okay, let me sit up for it takes my shirt
607
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:59,600
Speaker 1: real quick. The gifts, the gifts. One of the gifts
608
00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:03,440
Speaker 1: that I got from my mother. I would say it's her,
609
00:33:05,240 --> 00:33:09,080
Speaker 1: it's her strength. I feel like I really, I really
610
00:33:09,720 --> 00:33:13,320
Speaker 1: bore witness to a woman who was like not to
611
00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:16,840
Speaker 1: be like she just really now. I don't know if
612
00:33:16,880 --> 00:33:20,480
Speaker 1: she wore that as an armor, you know, or what
613
00:33:20,680 --> 00:33:22,720
Speaker 1: that was, but I found her to be quite like
614
00:33:24,240 --> 00:33:29,480
Speaker 1: like straight and clear and strong, and there was kind
615
00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:34,640
Speaker 1: of no getting around it, and you kind of just knew, Okay,
616
00:33:35,320 --> 00:33:37,240
Speaker 1: this is what it is. And I feel like I
617
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:40,239
Speaker 1: really received a lot from that as a woman, as
618
00:33:40,280 --> 00:33:42,440
Speaker 1: a young woman, as a woman who would have to
619
00:33:42,520 --> 00:33:45,959
Speaker 1: be at the forefront of her own life and career
620
00:33:46,240 --> 00:33:49,160
Speaker 1: and really have to be in my space of power,
621
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:51,840
Speaker 1: be around a lot of people that want to take
622
00:33:51,880 --> 00:33:54,120
Speaker 1: your power, still your light, you know, lead you in
623
00:33:54,160 --> 00:33:56,600
Speaker 1: the wrong spaces. I had to kind of be in
624
00:33:56,720 --> 00:34:00,120
Speaker 1: my strength, and I did receive that from her. I
625
00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:06,480
Speaker 1: received from my father, was I think. I think I
626
00:34:06,640 --> 00:34:16,200
Speaker 1: think I also received a level of self determination because
627
00:34:16,239 --> 00:34:18,399
Speaker 1: I had a unique relationship. My mother and my father
628
00:34:18,480 --> 00:34:22,200
Speaker 1: were not married or together, and so one I had
629
00:34:22,200 --> 00:34:25,239
Speaker 1: to learn that that's actually not unique or different. You know,
630
00:34:25,280 --> 00:34:28,640
Speaker 1: there's not some kind of like family structure that's like
631
00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:30,800
Speaker 1: the main one I think we get the painted that
632
00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:33,080
Speaker 1: picture so much and then we feel so true, we
633
00:34:33,239 --> 00:34:38,160
Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable that ours doesn't look like that. But so
634
00:34:38,360 --> 00:34:41,000
Speaker 1: I had to kind of know who I was also
635
00:34:42,239 --> 00:34:44,319
Speaker 1: even in our relationship, and so I got a sense
636
00:34:44,360 --> 00:34:48,640
Speaker 1: of self as well. Sense of self. The gap from
637
00:34:48,680 --> 00:34:50,479
Speaker 1: the sense of self that I received from my father
638
00:34:50,680 --> 00:34:59,080
Speaker 1: was probably maybe some feelings of not being worthy. So
639
00:34:59,239 --> 00:35:04,520
Speaker 1: I received of that I had to restructure my brain around.
640
00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:08,000
Speaker 1: And from my mother, I think I got a sense
641
00:35:08,160 --> 00:35:13,480
Speaker 1: of fixing. I had to fix everything because in a
642
00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:16,320
Speaker 1: lot of ways, if she was strong and angry, I
643
00:35:16,400 --> 00:35:19,719
Speaker 1: had to be like soft and accommodating and kind of
644
00:35:19,880 --> 00:35:26,160
Speaker 1: fix the situation. And so I think I received some
645
00:35:26,320 --> 00:35:29,960
Speaker 1: of that, which I also had a real wire No, no, no,
646
00:35:30,200 --> 00:35:32,799
Speaker 1: I can't fix everything. I just can't, And I can't
647
00:35:32,840 --> 00:35:35,440
Speaker 1: be in my relationships like that because that's not gonna work.
648
00:35:36,000 --> 00:35:38,120
Speaker 1: Man took lots of time, But those are my gifts
649
00:35:38,120 --> 00:35:42,040
Speaker 1: and my guess I'm asking that to many people. This
650
00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:43,240
Speaker 1: is a great question.
651
00:35:43,840 --> 00:35:47,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it has such a we don't realize
652
00:35:47,360 --> 00:35:50,719
Speaker 2: how much of an impact it has on every relationship
653
00:35:51,440 --> 00:35:54,960
Speaker 2: that comes after those relationships with our parents, and how
654
00:35:55,000 --> 00:35:57,240
Speaker 2: it becomes like the guiding map of our whole life.
655
00:35:57,680 --> 00:35:59,040
Speaker 2: And then you look back and you go, why am
656
00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:01,320
Speaker 2: I expecting someone to give me this gift? It's like,
657
00:36:01,320 --> 00:36:03,520
Speaker 2: because my parents gave me. And now I want everyone
658
00:36:03,600 --> 00:36:06,000
Speaker 2: that loves me to show me they love me in
659
00:36:06,160 --> 00:36:09,040
Speaker 2: this way, and I want them to fill this exact gap.
660
00:36:09,120 --> 00:36:10,640
Speaker 2: And if they don't fill this gap, then they don't
661
00:36:10,680 --> 00:36:13,480
Speaker 2: love me. Because that was where that's self worth you
662
00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:16,000
Speaker 2: are saying of like, because if you were made to
663
00:36:16,040 --> 00:36:19,280
Speaker 2: feel unworthy in a certain way, then you think anyone
664
00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:21,480
Speaker 2: who doesn't show you love in that way, then they
665
00:36:21,520 --> 00:36:24,080
Speaker 2: don't think you're worthy. But they may not they're not
666
00:36:24,160 --> 00:36:27,440
Speaker 2: aware of the gift and the gap right and there
667
00:36:27,640 --> 00:36:31,279
Speaker 2: as well, So that's the Yeah, it's a lot. It's
668
00:36:31,320 --> 00:36:32,719
Speaker 2: a lot. And I mean obviously you've been married for
669
00:36:32,760 --> 00:36:38,280
Speaker 2: what fourteen years? Yes, that's amazing, that's beautiful.
670
00:36:38,320 --> 00:36:41,000
Speaker 1: We're like, whoa, that's crazy, it's brilliant love it.
671
00:36:42,000 --> 00:36:43,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, you look I always whenever I see. But if
672
00:36:43,920 --> 00:36:47,600
Speaker 2: you seem so happy and joyous and you know, complimentary
673
00:36:47,640 --> 00:36:50,480
Speaker 2: to each other, I think what I found really fascinating
674
00:36:50,560 --> 00:36:52,960
Speaker 2: in relationships is what people end up teaching each other.
675
00:36:53,320 --> 00:36:55,040
Speaker 2: What would you say, Swiss has been able to teach you,
676
00:36:55,120 --> 00:36:56,040
Speaker 2: and what have you taught him?
677
00:36:56,160 --> 00:37:00,600
Speaker 1: He's definitely taught me how to be like much more
678
00:37:00,719 --> 00:37:03,759
Speaker 1: in the flow, Like it's all about kind of the
679
00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:07,520
Speaker 1: magic of the moment and allowing the flow, like just
680
00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:12,479
Speaker 1: slide into the slipstream let it happen, like, let it happen.
681
00:37:13,880 --> 00:37:16,840
Speaker 1: That's been a big lesson he's given me. And what
682
00:37:17,000 --> 00:37:20,759
Speaker 1: I've been able to give him is probably a little
683
00:37:20,840 --> 00:37:25,840
Speaker 1: bit more of like, let's design what we want to happen,
684
00:37:26,320 --> 00:37:28,480
Speaker 1: you know, as we're letting it happen, let's also like
685
00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:32,520
Speaker 1: design it and craft it and strategize it and create
686
00:37:32,600 --> 00:37:35,839
Speaker 1: it and schedule it so that it can really really happen.
687
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:38,400
Speaker 1: And I love how we balance each other like that.
688
00:37:38,520 --> 00:37:40,680
Speaker 1: There's been just so much growth between us and so
689
00:37:41,040 --> 00:37:44,320
Speaker 1: in such a positive way because we really do compliment
690
00:37:44,360 --> 00:37:46,920
Speaker 1: each other, so it feels natural in those ways.
691
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:49,680
Speaker 2: So I'm you and my wife Swizz, So I'm like
692
00:37:49,719 --> 00:37:56,440
Speaker 2: that very very like I'm like strategy designed, intentional life
693
00:37:56,960 --> 00:38:01,480
Speaker 2: and she's just like this. But I wanted to ask you,
694
00:38:01,719 --> 00:38:05,920
Speaker 2: is those things seem like they're at loggerheads with each other, right,
695
00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:09,839
Speaker 2: Like they seem like on the outside, that would seem like, well,
696
00:38:09,840 --> 00:38:11,640
Speaker 2: if he's like go with the flow and you're like, yeah,
697
00:38:11,680 --> 00:38:14,280
Speaker 2: but we need to know what we're doing, that sounds
698
00:38:14,440 --> 00:38:17,719
Speaker 2: like a terrible matchup. Like that sounds like a fight
699
00:38:18,080 --> 00:38:20,080
Speaker 2: ready to you know, explode, waiting to happen. Yeah, and
700
00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:24,960
Speaker 2: an explosion because that's completely contradictory in terms of him
701
00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:27,760
Speaker 2: being in flow and same with RADI like being completely
702
00:38:27,880 --> 00:38:31,120
Speaker 2: this bundle and ball of energy and joy and then
703
00:38:31,840 --> 00:38:34,840
Speaker 2: we're both trying to be more thoughtful and strategic. So
704
00:38:35,000 --> 00:38:38,320
Speaker 2: how does that How have you allowed each other to
705
00:38:38,480 --> 00:38:41,440
Speaker 2: operate as who you are and take without feeling like
706
00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:45,360
Speaker 2: someone's trying to change you or that you've got to
707
00:38:45,400 --> 00:38:47,359
Speaker 2: be someone else or they've got to be someone else.
708
00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:49,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, No, I think it's I think it's a good point. Well,
709
00:38:49,400 --> 00:38:52,000
Speaker 1: first of all, I don't think I think actually it
710
00:38:52,120 --> 00:38:55,560
Speaker 1: tends to work better when there's two different perspectives, right,
711
00:38:55,600 --> 00:38:57,840
Speaker 1: because if you think exactly what I think and I
712
00:38:57,920 --> 00:39:00,719
Speaker 1: think exactly what you think, and we might get to
713
00:39:00,800 --> 00:39:05,320
Speaker 1: that place of boredom or to discussed. But what I
714
00:39:05,400 --> 00:39:07,440
Speaker 1: took from what you said on board, I took almost
715
00:39:07,520 --> 00:39:10,040
Speaker 1: like there's not a stimuli, right, There's not like the
716
00:39:10,200 --> 00:39:14,280
Speaker 1: stimulation that comes sometimes, and I think that might happen
717
00:39:14,320 --> 00:39:17,760
Speaker 1: if you're almost too similar. There's a stimulation from meeting
718
00:39:17,800 --> 00:39:20,800
Speaker 1: and opposition and meeting like a different way of thinking,
719
00:39:20,920 --> 00:39:22,920
Speaker 1: and then having to think about it and put it
720
00:39:23,000 --> 00:39:28,920
Speaker 1: into your world. So yeah, I think that the flow
721
00:39:29,080 --> 00:39:31,879
Speaker 1: is just because I love how he thinks, and how
722
00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:35,200
Speaker 1: he thinks is so uniquely him, and it does inspire me.
723
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:38,399
Speaker 1: And yet I can still be connected to my own
724
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:42,520
Speaker 1: and similar lee. I think how I think does inspire him.
725
00:39:42,520 --> 00:39:44,080
Speaker 1: He says, let me think about that more, let me
726
00:39:44,160 --> 00:39:46,400
Speaker 1: put a little more thought into how we're doing this,
727
00:39:47,480 --> 00:39:49,520
Speaker 1: And yet doesn't have to take him from his own
728
00:39:49,560 --> 00:39:54,279
Speaker 1: so Ever, since the day our vows were about this
729
00:39:54,440 --> 00:39:57,120
Speaker 1: idea of loving with an open hand, there's a beautiful
730
00:39:57,600 --> 00:40:00,640
Speaker 1: thought of loving with an open hand, and you know
731
00:40:01,080 --> 00:40:04,120
Speaker 1: that everyone should be free to fly as they want
732
00:40:04,160 --> 00:40:06,959
Speaker 1: to fly. It should never be a closed hand over
733
00:40:07,200 --> 00:40:08,560
Speaker 1: around someone.
734
00:40:09,800 --> 00:40:10,000
Speaker 2: Like that.
735
00:40:10,239 --> 00:40:12,400
Speaker 1: You know, it should be this open hand, And so
736
00:40:13,000 --> 00:40:15,839
Speaker 1: we really have always looked at it like that. He'll
737
00:40:15,840 --> 00:40:19,040
Speaker 1: always says, she's her own boss. I don't have anything
738
00:40:19,120 --> 00:40:22,360
Speaker 1: to do with whatever she's choosing. Don't call me, and
739
00:40:22,520 --> 00:40:25,480
Speaker 1: asked me to try to get her I can't. She's
740
00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:28,520
Speaker 1: her own boss, so talk to her about whatever that
741
00:40:28,680 --> 00:40:32,400
Speaker 1: might be. And and so there's always been that respect
742
00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:35,280
Speaker 1: there that we each have our own way of flowing
743
00:40:35,560 --> 00:40:36,560
Speaker 1: and it works.
744
00:40:36,920 --> 00:40:39,239
Speaker 2: It works. That's beautiful to hear. And I love that.
745
00:40:39,880 --> 00:40:42,240
Speaker 2: Did you write there was that poem that you came across?
746
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:44,600
Speaker 1: I can remember where that came from, but I wrote
747
00:40:44,600 --> 00:40:47,399
Speaker 1: a song about it that never came out, no way, Yeah,
748
00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:50,520
Speaker 1: And I always loved that metaphor so do I.
749
00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:52,680
Speaker 2: Just as when you were moving your hands for anyone
750
00:40:52,680 --> 00:40:55,359
Speaker 2: who's not watching right, Alicia was moving her hands from
751
00:40:55,400 --> 00:40:58,280
Speaker 2: being open to like holding one of her hands closed.
752
00:40:59,080 --> 00:40:59,640
Speaker 2: And we do that.
753
00:40:59,800 --> 00:41:03,120
Speaker 1: We like stifle each other and hold each other and
754
00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:07,000
Speaker 1: demand these things and don't want people to be free
755
00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:10,120
Speaker 1: to express and feel fear and worry when people are
756
00:41:10,480 --> 00:41:14,080
Speaker 1: bright and shining, and we feel, you know, sometimes afraid
757
00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:16,920
Speaker 1: of that that they would somehow not need us anymore
758
00:41:17,080 --> 00:41:19,960
Speaker 1: or not want us anymore. And you know, but there's
759
00:41:20,000 --> 00:41:23,680
Speaker 1: this beautiful thing of just being, this equanimity that's what
760
00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:27,440
Speaker 1: I've always experienced with him. It's like this equanimity between
761
00:41:27,560 --> 00:41:31,160
Speaker 1: us that I've never felt anywhere else, And it's natural.
762
00:41:32,080 --> 00:41:35,400
Speaker 1: We just have a similar frequency that we vibrate on
763
00:41:36,040 --> 00:41:38,399
Speaker 1: and it just works. And I've been in situations where
764
00:41:38,440 --> 00:41:42,840
Speaker 1: it's like, man, I kind of have to keep I
765
00:41:42,920 --> 00:41:44,719
Speaker 1: can come out here with me, or I have to
766
00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:47,320
Speaker 1: go you know, find that, but it's like we're not
767
00:41:47,480 --> 00:41:50,360
Speaker 1: quite on the same level. And so that means something.
768
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:53,160
Speaker 1: You know, finding that frequency that vibrates with you is
769
00:41:53,680 --> 00:41:53,960
Speaker 1: a thing.
770
00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:56,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, No, I love that. I wrote a chapter of
771
00:41:56,600 --> 00:42:00,960
Speaker 2: my last book called your partner is your Guru, and
772
00:42:01,080 --> 00:42:04,680
Speaker 2: it's that I feel that way, like you know, and
773
00:42:05,040 --> 00:42:08,480
Speaker 2: I think that the quality that required so much in
774
00:42:08,560 --> 00:42:13,080
Speaker 2: long term relationships as humility, and it's the hardest quality
775
00:42:13,160 --> 00:42:15,640
Speaker 2: to have with your partner often where we have our
776
00:42:15,680 --> 00:42:18,680
Speaker 2: biggest egos and we say this is the person we
777
00:42:18,760 --> 00:42:20,600
Speaker 2: love the most, but they're the person we have the
778
00:42:20,680 --> 00:42:23,920
Speaker 2: least humility with, Like if they don't like what we're wearing,
779
00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:27,560
Speaker 2: or if they give us feedback or that it hurts
780
00:42:27,600 --> 00:42:28,160
Speaker 2: the most.
781
00:42:28,120 --> 00:42:32,080
Speaker 1: Because so so so pure.
782
00:42:32,480 --> 00:42:36,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, good point stops us sometimes from opening up,
783
00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:39,759
Speaker 2: as you're talking about as you have been able to like.
784
00:42:39,920 --> 00:42:42,560
Speaker 2: It stops you from sometimes learning from that person because
785
00:42:42,600 --> 00:42:45,080
Speaker 2: you think your ways the right way, or that what
786
00:42:45,280 --> 00:42:48,120
Speaker 2: you learned and what you inherited was the right way
787
00:42:48,160 --> 00:42:50,960
Speaker 2: to solve a problem, especially I'm imagining when you have kids.
788
00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:57,000
Speaker 1: That's first, because we do find ourselves in those circumstances
789
00:42:57,040 --> 00:43:01,000
Speaker 1: where naturally something that he might feel is quite different
790
00:43:01,040 --> 00:43:03,560
Speaker 1: from what I might feel in regards to the kids.
791
00:43:04,360 --> 00:43:09,000
Speaker 1: And you know, I think that anytime that's happened, I
792
00:43:09,239 --> 00:43:14,879
Speaker 1: can reflect that there surely has is a better way
793
00:43:14,960 --> 00:43:17,840
Speaker 1: of communicating what it is. And I find that that
794
00:43:18,120 --> 00:43:21,239
Speaker 1: is the most powerful part. How do you choose to
795
00:43:21,320 --> 00:43:23,640
Speaker 1: communicate with the people that you love is really the
796
00:43:23,719 --> 00:43:29,440
Speaker 1: key to kind of life, like literally that that energy
797
00:43:29,560 --> 00:43:31,839
Speaker 1: that you're giving and how you're choosing to communicate will
798
00:43:31,880 --> 00:43:35,120
Speaker 1: make the difference between you know, something where you both
799
00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:37,520
Speaker 1: can evolve and both can say I get it, I
800
00:43:37,560 --> 00:43:40,000
Speaker 1: see what you mean, and you can see what I mean,
801
00:43:40,160 --> 00:43:41,600
Speaker 1: and we can kind of find our way through it.
802
00:43:42,640 --> 00:43:46,440
Speaker 1: Or they argument, this is just a pain, and you
803
00:43:46,520 --> 00:43:48,320
Speaker 1: got you know, you gotta do all that, which we
804
00:43:48,440 --> 00:43:51,879
Speaker 1: actually don't argue. We have a we don't we don't argue.
805
00:43:51,960 --> 00:43:56,440
Speaker 1: Surely we get upset or we disagree, but there's not
806
00:43:56,560 --> 00:43:59,600
Speaker 1: like a yelling and screaming and an arguing and a
807
00:43:59,719 --> 00:44:02,960
Speaker 1: k and a slamming and a throwing there's not that,
808
00:44:03,080 --> 00:44:04,880
Speaker 1: Like we respect each other too much for that. And
809
00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:09,080
Speaker 1: I really appreciate that that that's the energy because I
810
00:44:09,160 --> 00:44:12,640
Speaker 1: do also appreciate that many people have to or choose
811
00:44:12,719 --> 00:44:16,400
Speaker 1: to or find themselves in the place of experiencing that
812
00:44:16,680 --> 00:44:20,320
Speaker 1: type of you know, interaction, and man, I mean that
813
00:44:20,480 --> 00:44:24,600
Speaker 1: is just so stressful and hard all around. So I'm
814
00:44:24,640 --> 00:44:27,520
Speaker 1: proud that we can like find that that place and
815
00:44:27,600 --> 00:44:29,560
Speaker 1: it is possible. Yeah, it is possible.
816
00:44:29,640 --> 00:44:32,000
Speaker 2: Well, it sounds like you've both been quite intentional about
817
00:44:32,000 --> 00:44:35,160
Speaker 2: your relationship from your vows from the beginning of like
818
00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:37,600
Speaker 2: what does this look like, right? And what are the
819
00:44:37,680 --> 00:44:41,399
Speaker 2: barriers around disagreements? Right, Like we're allowed to disagree. We're
820
00:44:41,400 --> 00:44:42,799
Speaker 2: allowed to and the same with me in my wife
821
00:44:42,840 --> 00:44:45,120
Speaker 2: we have a rule as well, like no yelling, no
822
00:44:45,360 --> 00:44:48,839
Speaker 2: raising the voice, no obviously nothing physical, but like right,
823
00:44:49,040 --> 00:44:52,759
Speaker 2: there has to be a very clear way of solving this,
824
00:44:53,000 --> 00:44:55,680
Speaker 2: and we're allowed to disagree. We're allowed to end on
825
00:44:55,840 --> 00:44:58,759
Speaker 2: completely two different sides of a conversation. We don't have
826
00:44:58,960 --> 00:45:02,080
Speaker 2: to end with perfect resolution. It may not be the way,
827
00:45:02,880 --> 00:45:05,160
Speaker 2: but we don't have to get there in a violent,
828
00:45:05,239 --> 00:45:08,920
Speaker 2: aggressive or tension field way. Through our words or our actions,
829
00:45:09,040 --> 00:45:12,440
Speaker 2: or our how loud we are, because that pushes the
830
00:45:12,480 --> 00:45:15,520
Speaker 2: person away so much. I've read this poem that was
831
00:45:15,600 --> 00:45:20,160
Speaker 2: talking about when people argue, they have to shout and
832
00:45:20,239 --> 00:45:23,920
Speaker 2: scream because that's how distant their souls are. And so
833
00:45:24,000 --> 00:45:27,600
Speaker 2: even though you're standing right in front of them, so
834
00:45:28,400 --> 00:45:31,120
Speaker 2: far away from you that you have to shout in
835
00:45:31,280 --> 00:45:33,520
Speaker 2: order to communicate, but you don't realize that that just
836
00:45:33,600 --> 00:45:36,720
Speaker 2: pushes them further away, and that actually if you whispered
837
00:45:36,760 --> 00:45:42,160
Speaker 2: and you were quiet, and you would actually draw them closer. Bar. Yeah,
838
00:45:42,200 --> 00:45:44,080
Speaker 2: and so it you know, I love that. I love
839
00:45:44,160 --> 00:45:46,040
Speaker 2: that metaphor, and I can't. I need to hear this
840
00:45:46,160 --> 00:45:48,440
Speaker 2: song that you've written about the hands.
841
00:45:48,360 --> 00:45:50,680
Speaker 1: I find it. I'll find it, at least i'll send
842
00:45:50,680 --> 00:45:53,239
Speaker 1: it to you, but i'll find that. I really like
843
00:45:53,360 --> 00:45:55,600
Speaker 1: it special. It's a special song. I wrote it when
844
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:57,920
Speaker 1: I came back from Egypt, and so it was a
845
00:45:57,960 --> 00:46:00,440
Speaker 1: while ago, but I took that a special ship to Egypt,
846
00:46:00,480 --> 00:46:02,400
Speaker 1: and I did a lot of songwriting right after that,
847
00:46:02,480 --> 00:46:04,719
Speaker 1: and that was kind of one of them. And it
848
00:46:04,800 --> 00:46:07,680
Speaker 1: was actually in honor of my godmother, who did experience
849
00:46:07,800 --> 00:46:12,560
Speaker 1: quite an abusive relationship. And so the line was the
850
00:46:12,719 --> 00:46:16,000
Speaker 1: tightest grip is an open hand.
851
00:46:17,320 --> 00:46:22,600
Speaker 2: I love that. That's beautiful. That's beautiful.
852
00:46:23,080 --> 00:46:23,279
Speaker 1: Yeah.
853
00:46:23,480 --> 00:46:25,800
Speaker 2: How do you decide that a song doesn't come out? Like?
854
00:46:25,880 --> 00:46:27,880
Speaker 2: How does? How does? Because how many songs does an
855
00:46:27,920 --> 00:46:32,120
Speaker 2: artists make? That? Never? So many like in your in
856
00:46:32,200 --> 00:46:35,279
Speaker 2: your lifetime, like how many songs? Never would? Would someone have? Never?
857
00:46:35,600 --> 00:46:36,200
Speaker 1: Three hundred?
858
00:46:36,600 --> 00:46:40,080
Speaker 2: Wow? Yeah, So that's like twenty albums with.
859
00:46:40,360 --> 00:46:42,759
Speaker 1: So many, so many that just you know, half done,
860
00:46:43,080 --> 00:46:47,000
Speaker 1: or you know, didn't quite just come together or just
861
00:46:47,360 --> 00:46:50,680
Speaker 1: didn't have that special thing enough to go to the
862
00:46:50,760 --> 00:46:54,960
Speaker 1: next level, or time passes in your relationship to yourself
863
00:46:55,080 --> 00:46:57,560
Speaker 1: is changing, so what you were, what you were expressing
864
00:46:57,640 --> 00:47:00,239
Speaker 1: at one point just doesn't represent where you are now.
865
00:47:00,280 --> 00:47:03,120
Speaker 1: And so then that kind of has its own In fact,
866
00:47:03,200 --> 00:47:07,480
Speaker 1: one of my albums, Keys, has a song on it
867
00:47:07,600 --> 00:47:10,800
Speaker 1: called is It Insane? And Keys came out in like
868
00:47:10,920 --> 00:47:15,560
Speaker 1: twenty twenty three, and is It Insane, which written in
869
00:47:15,719 --> 00:47:18,960
Speaker 1: like two thousand. It's like it was, but it was
870
00:47:19,120 --> 00:47:23,440
Speaker 1: not ready until that moment and then it was ready.
871
00:47:23,920 --> 00:47:26,000
Speaker 1: So back to that whole thing where nothing's ever ready
872
00:47:26,040 --> 00:47:28,600
Speaker 1: when you think it's time, yeah, and then finally you're like,
873
00:47:28,680 --> 00:47:29,279
Speaker 1: oh it's time.
874
00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:32,319
Speaker 2: I get it. Yeah, and times usually you're so. When
875
00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:33,800
Speaker 2: you said that earlier, I thought of it. I was like,
876
00:47:34,200 --> 00:47:37,279
Speaker 2: time is actually what puts anxiety onto everything. If we
877
00:47:37,360 --> 00:47:39,920
Speaker 2: say I have to have achieved this by this age,
878
00:47:40,960 --> 00:47:44,439
Speaker 2: that's now the anxiety because if it took twenty three years,
879
00:47:44,480 --> 00:47:46,120
Speaker 2: it took twenty three years and you got there in
880
00:47:46,160 --> 00:47:48,080
Speaker 2: the end, right. But if you said this has to
881
00:47:48,120 --> 00:47:52,160
Speaker 2: be ready this year, that's what put anxiety on everything.
882
00:47:52,200 --> 00:47:54,320
Speaker 2: And I was thinking about that. You're so right that
883
00:47:55,000 --> 00:47:59,400
Speaker 2: when I make something not on the universe's time and
884
00:47:59,480 --> 00:48:02,239
Speaker 2: not on de fin timing, and it's on my timing.
885
00:48:02,800 --> 00:48:04,480
Speaker 1: That's when you're stressed.
886
00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:05,600
Speaker 2: That's what I'm stressed about.
887
00:48:05,680 --> 00:48:06,239
Speaker 1: Freaking out.
888
00:48:06,440 --> 00:48:08,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, And of course there are things you have to
889
00:48:09,040 --> 00:48:11,440
Speaker 2: like if you have contracts and commitments.
890
00:48:11,000 --> 00:48:12,680
Speaker 1: And you have to get it in a time, yeah,
891
00:48:12,719 --> 00:48:13,399
Speaker 1: you do your best.
892
00:48:13,520 --> 00:48:16,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, But it's when we're asking or trying to manifest
893
00:48:16,520 --> 00:48:20,640
Speaker 2: things that we put time on. It changes what you
894
00:48:20,840 --> 00:48:22,799
Speaker 2: were saying you love crystals earlier. I was wondering, what's
895
00:48:22,800 --> 00:48:25,839
Speaker 2: your favorite crystal and where did you find it? How
896
00:48:25,880 --> 00:48:27,880
Speaker 2: did you learn about them? I feel like you have
897
00:48:28,000 --> 00:48:30,920
Speaker 2: such a deeply spiritual side. I don't want to hear
898
00:48:30,920 --> 00:48:32,840
Speaker 2: about it, because I don't think we've dived into this before.
899
00:48:32,960 --> 00:48:35,239
Speaker 1: I love that's a good one man. Okay, So where
900
00:48:35,360 --> 00:48:38,400
Speaker 1: did my love for crystals come first? I think that
901
00:48:39,560 --> 00:48:45,160
Speaker 1: I learned that going to these crystal shops, there's something
902
00:48:45,880 --> 00:48:50,520
Speaker 1: so beautiful about the process. And I remember doing a
903
00:48:50,640 --> 00:48:54,920
Speaker 1: beautiful book called The Artist's Way Julia Cameron. I believe
904
00:48:54,920 --> 00:48:58,000
Speaker 1: her name is like tried and true book, like classic,
905
00:48:58,680 --> 00:49:00,920
Speaker 1: and one of the things that was beautiful about it
906
00:49:01,080 --> 00:49:04,160
Speaker 1: is she says, take yourself on an artist's date. So
907
00:49:04,280 --> 00:49:06,000
Speaker 1: once a week you were meant to take yourself on
908
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:08,080
Speaker 1: an artist date, which meant you couldn't go with no
909
00:49:08,200 --> 00:49:10,400
Speaker 1: one except yourself, and you had to think of what
910
00:49:10,560 --> 00:49:14,640
Speaker 1: would serve you on that date, which is quite hard
911
00:49:15,000 --> 00:49:17,000
Speaker 1: for many of us, Like what will make me happy?
912
00:49:17,040 --> 00:49:19,719
Speaker 1: Where would I like to go? In crystal shops? This
913
00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:23,080
Speaker 1: is what I discovered was one of the things I
914
00:49:23,280 --> 00:49:25,800
Speaker 1: loved it. I loved the peace and the serenity. I
915
00:49:25,920 --> 00:49:29,000
Speaker 1: loved exploring every name. I found that if I went
916
00:49:29,120 --> 00:49:32,560
Speaker 1: to one, it would be exactly the one I needed.
917
00:49:32,840 --> 00:49:35,560
Speaker 1: I would just look at the way it looked and
918
00:49:35,680 --> 00:49:37,400
Speaker 1: I would pick it up. I'm like, that's what I
919
00:49:37,520 --> 00:49:40,759
Speaker 1: need right now. I need more courage, I need more,
920
00:49:41,040 --> 00:49:44,560
Speaker 1: I need more manifestation, I need more clarity. When I
921
00:49:44,640 --> 00:49:46,560
Speaker 1: did take my trip to Egypt that we talked about,
922
00:49:46,920 --> 00:49:49,600
Speaker 1: I learned that the native it was native to where
923
00:49:49,640 --> 00:49:54,040
Speaker 1: we were was the Lupus lazui that blew powerful stone,
924
00:49:54,080 --> 00:49:57,319
Speaker 1: and I just became fascinated with it. So the more
925
00:49:57,440 --> 00:50:00,200
Speaker 1: that I discovered, the more that crystals became. I'm a
926
00:50:00,280 --> 00:50:03,239
Speaker 1: part of my life. Even in my son's pocket, I'll
927
00:50:03,280 --> 00:50:06,160
Speaker 1: put a crystal. If he's feeling worried, or if he's
928
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:08,839
Speaker 1: feeling like or if he needs a little grounding, I'll
929
00:50:08,880 --> 00:50:10,719
Speaker 1: put a crystal in his pocket, or I'll tell him
930
00:50:10,760 --> 00:50:13,440
Speaker 1: hold it, just because I do know. There is something
931
00:50:13,480 --> 00:50:16,000
Speaker 1: about the power of crystals, and that in fact is
932
00:50:16,040 --> 00:50:19,120
Speaker 1: one of the most kind of secret parts of Key's
933
00:50:19,200 --> 00:50:23,719
Speaker 1: soul care because the crystals are infused into the offerings,
934
00:50:24,360 --> 00:50:28,640
Speaker 1: and we have these beautiful offerings called the Illuminating Serum,
935
00:50:28,719 --> 00:50:31,600
Speaker 1: which I just love because we need to illuminate as
936
00:50:31,719 --> 00:50:35,000
Speaker 1: much as possible, and they are really based on these crystals.
937
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:39,960
Speaker 1: So one's the moonstone aura, and that is so good manifestation.
938
00:50:40,160 --> 00:50:43,160
Speaker 1: One is the bronzeite aura, and that is all about courage,
939
00:50:43,480 --> 00:50:48,759
Speaker 1: and one is the quartz, the golden quartz Aura's and
940
00:50:48,920 --> 00:50:52,919
Speaker 1: that is so each one has these powers that even
941
00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:55,880
Speaker 1: you should put on your body in your universe. And
942
00:50:56,000 --> 00:50:58,759
Speaker 1: I just love that because there is such a there
943
00:50:58,840 --> 00:51:01,160
Speaker 1: is a strength, there is a power, there is a mysticism,
944
00:51:01,280 --> 00:51:03,920
Speaker 1: there is a there are these ancient rituals, like our
945
00:51:04,000 --> 00:51:08,600
Speaker 1: ancestors did these things hundreds and hundreds of years ago,
946
00:51:09,080 --> 00:51:13,400
Speaker 1: and we've somehow sometimes lost touch with those rituals in
947
00:51:13,480 --> 00:51:16,759
Speaker 1: those ancient ways, and so I love discovering them and
948
00:51:16,880 --> 00:51:21,560
Speaker 1: they really give me a sense of like I feel
949
00:51:21,600 --> 00:51:24,480
Speaker 1: like I have something in my pocket that's like it's
950
00:51:24,520 --> 00:51:26,680
Speaker 1: going to help me and I really really love it.
951
00:51:26,840 --> 00:51:29,120
Speaker 2: Or on my body. Yeah, now you can put it
952
00:51:29,160 --> 00:51:29,640
Speaker 2: on your money.
953
00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:33,640
Speaker 1: It feels like and it illuminates you. So it also
954
00:51:33,719 --> 00:51:36,520
Speaker 1: gives you that glow that's just really already even within you.
955
00:51:37,040 --> 00:51:38,040
Speaker 1: Yeah that's the point.
956
00:51:38,440 --> 00:51:40,680
Speaker 2: No, I love that you've infused it in the offerings
957
00:51:40,719 --> 00:51:44,160
Speaker 2: because I feel like I too love that. Like I
958
00:51:44,400 --> 00:51:46,560
Speaker 2: sometimes you see a crystal and you're just drawn to it,
959
00:51:46,920 --> 00:51:48,640
Speaker 2: where you see a gem and you're just drawn to
960
00:51:48,760 --> 00:51:51,000
Speaker 2: it and you can't explain it because it's not like
961
00:51:51,080 --> 00:51:53,960
Speaker 2: you were into that color or you're into that shape,
962
00:51:54,239 --> 00:51:56,080
Speaker 2: and all of a sudden, you're just like, why am
963
00:51:56,160 --> 00:51:58,239
Speaker 2: I attracted to this thing?
964
00:51:58,760 --> 00:51:59,440
Speaker 1: Because you need it?
965
00:51:59,520 --> 00:52:03,400
Speaker 2: Because it exactly And I think we've lost the ability
966
00:52:03,520 --> 00:52:07,960
Speaker 2: to trust ourselves on what we need because everything's become
967
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:13,120
Speaker 2: didactic and tactical and kind of too formulated.
968
00:52:15,440 --> 00:52:18,480
Speaker 1: I'm very moved by this because as we were just
969
00:52:18,560 --> 00:52:22,960
Speaker 1: talking about kids, and you know, as a parent, you
970
00:52:23,120 --> 00:52:28,600
Speaker 1: think about we do take we can We have the
971
00:52:28,760 --> 00:52:37,440
Speaker 1: power to take the trust from people when they feel
972
00:52:37,600 --> 00:52:41,440
Speaker 1: like they can't trust themselves because we judge them on
973
00:52:41,719 --> 00:52:45,239
Speaker 1: something that they've decided. And we do this as adults
974
00:52:45,320 --> 00:52:47,359
Speaker 1: to each other. We do this as parents to kids.
975
00:52:47,400 --> 00:52:50,759
Speaker 1: We do this as friends, you know, And we do
976
00:52:50,920 --> 00:52:53,799
Speaker 1: this thing where we judge a person, and now we've
977
00:52:54,040 --> 00:52:57,280
Speaker 1: taken away a bit of their trust in themselves because
978
00:52:57,320 --> 00:53:00,600
Speaker 1: they feel like this person may fun of me when
979
00:53:00,640 --> 00:53:01,000
Speaker 1: I did this.
980
00:53:01,360 --> 00:53:01,920
Speaker 2: I won't do that.
981
00:53:02,040 --> 00:53:05,960
Speaker 1: But your instinct was to do this, and you loved it.
982
00:53:06,000 --> 00:53:07,920
Speaker 1: When you did it, you were happy, you were excited,
983
00:53:07,960 --> 00:53:13,200
Speaker 1: you were giddy. And perhaps we allow people to steal
984
00:53:13,239 --> 00:53:15,040
Speaker 1: that from us. But many times we're not in a
985
00:53:15,080 --> 00:53:18,359
Speaker 1: position of awareness, so we just find that we then
986
00:53:18,440 --> 00:53:21,960
Speaker 1: distrust ourselves. And I think that's a big one, because
987
00:53:22,200 --> 00:53:25,000
Speaker 1: how can we start to trust ourselves again. How can
988
00:53:25,080 --> 00:53:28,600
Speaker 1: we practice like, no, no, this is good for me.
989
00:53:28,840 --> 00:53:30,640
Speaker 1: You might not like it. It's cool. You don't have
990
00:53:30,719 --> 00:53:32,759
Speaker 1: to do it. I'm not telling you to do it.
991
00:53:32,840 --> 00:53:35,439
Speaker 1: I'm telling you I'm doing it. And I think that's
992
00:53:35,600 --> 00:53:39,320
Speaker 1: really important. And I hope that we can first be
993
00:53:39,640 --> 00:53:43,160
Speaker 1: a little bit more conscious of always injecting our opinion
994
00:53:43,239 --> 00:53:48,279
Speaker 1: on everybody, as parents, as friends, as you know, elders,
995
00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:53,040
Speaker 1: and secondly to as the people who have to navigate
996
00:53:53,120 --> 00:53:56,480
Speaker 1: our way through that, remembering that if that was our
997
00:53:56,520 --> 00:54:00,440
Speaker 1: first instinct and we felt joy with it, know, then
998
00:54:00,560 --> 00:54:03,120
Speaker 1: there's something in there to learn or explore or find
999
00:54:03,239 --> 00:54:06,680
Speaker 1: the color and or curiosity and and and I want
1000
00:54:06,800 --> 00:54:08,759
Speaker 1: us to do I want us and not forget that. Yeah,
1001
00:54:08,840 --> 00:54:10,439
Speaker 1: that's a big one. You just said.
1002
00:54:10,719 --> 00:54:13,399
Speaker 2: No, you so well said. I couldn't agree with you more.
1003
00:54:13,480 --> 00:54:16,080
Speaker 2: And I remember when I first trained to be a coach,
1004
00:54:16,800 --> 00:54:20,399
Speaker 2: the number one training was how you don't project your
1005
00:54:20,560 --> 00:54:24,720
Speaker 2: life and your limits onto anyone, Like that's the core skill,
1006
00:54:24,880 --> 00:54:27,919
Speaker 2: because that's all we do all day. Like someone says
1007
00:54:27,960 --> 00:54:30,759
Speaker 2: their idea and we project our view to it, right,
1008
00:54:30,840 --> 00:54:32,319
Speaker 2: Like someone's like, hey, I want to be a singer
1009
00:54:32,360 --> 00:54:37,040
Speaker 2: like Alicia Keys, and you're like, yeah, you might as well. Yeah,
1010
00:54:37,120 --> 00:54:39,200
Speaker 2: and it's like, but you have no idea what they're saying.
1011
00:54:39,280 --> 00:54:41,399
Speaker 2: You don't. You're not listening to them, there's no there's
1012
00:54:41,440 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 2: no learning, and you're just projecting what you feel. Or
1013
00:54:43,480 --> 00:54:46,240
Speaker 2: someone says I think I'm quitting my job and pursuing
1014
00:54:46,280 --> 00:54:47,800
Speaker 2: my passion on this thing, and you're like, no, no, no,
1015
00:54:48,040 --> 00:54:50,400
Speaker 2: don't do that, Like that's risky, and it's like, well,
1016
00:54:50,440 --> 00:54:52,919
Speaker 2: maybe it's maybe they need it. Yeah, maybe it's needed.
1017
00:54:53,000 --> 00:54:55,440
Speaker 2: Maybe risk is okay for them. And but we're so
1018
00:54:55,680 --> 00:54:57,720
Speaker 2: quick and you're so right that our friends are family
1019
00:54:58,000 --> 00:55:00,759
Speaker 2: and we we do that to others and we do
1020
00:55:00,880 --> 00:55:03,600
Speaker 2: to our partners as well, Like when they're just saying, hey,
1021
00:55:03,640 --> 00:55:05,200
Speaker 2: you know what, I think I need a weekend off
1022
00:55:05,239 --> 00:55:07,640
Speaker 2: this weekend and you're like, no, maybe there's a few
1023
00:55:07,680 --> 00:55:10,040
Speaker 2: things you need to get done, and they're actually yeah,
1024
00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:12,759
Speaker 2: and you're so what you said so beautifully is we
1025
00:55:12,880 --> 00:55:16,680
Speaker 2: stop people from trusting themselves. Like I think that really
1026
00:55:16,800 --> 00:55:21,160
Speaker 2: resonated with me, and I think that's why I feel
1027
00:55:21,200 --> 00:55:25,759
Speaker 2: the fact that you've infused all these crystals into your offerings.
1028
00:55:25,880 --> 00:55:28,840
Speaker 2: I love that because it's it's a daily reminder of
1029
00:55:29,040 --> 00:55:32,959
Speaker 2: trusting that when you I always say this to people,
1030
00:55:33,000 --> 00:55:37,960
Speaker 2: I'm like, we don't use our senses enough. Like the
1031
00:55:38,680 --> 00:55:43,640
Speaker 2: scent is so powerful, right, your products smell amazing and
1032
00:55:44,080 --> 00:55:46,680
Speaker 2: the sense amazing, and it's like we underestimate how much
1033
00:55:46,760 --> 00:55:48,680
Speaker 2: we know what we need by scent. Like I love it.
1034
00:55:48,760 --> 00:55:51,120
Speaker 2: I remember when I first got a massage and they
1035
00:55:51,320 --> 00:55:54,359
Speaker 2: brought out all the different oils. They said which one
1036
00:55:55,160 --> 00:55:57,120
Speaker 2: and they were like, you know by smelling, and I
1037
00:55:57,280 --> 00:55:58,800
Speaker 2: was like, what does that mean? And then you do
1038
00:55:58,880 --> 00:56:00,480
Speaker 2: it and you're like, oh, wait a minute, I do know.
1039
00:56:00,840 --> 00:56:04,160
Speaker 2: I do know that I need number three, which has
1040
00:56:04,239 --> 00:56:06,600
Speaker 2: lavender and you ca liptus or whatever it is, because
1041
00:56:07,080 --> 00:56:10,720
Speaker 2: I'm seeking rest and relaxation, or I do need citrus
1042
00:56:10,760 --> 00:56:14,440
Speaker 2: because I'm seeking energy, and you know right, but we
1043
00:56:14,520 --> 00:56:17,480
Speaker 2: don't use that set. We don't use our power of scent,
1044
00:56:17,960 --> 00:56:20,879
Speaker 2: of sight, of sound to know what we need.
1045
00:56:21,600 --> 00:56:24,279
Speaker 1: And the part that I love about what you said
1046
00:56:24,600 --> 00:56:28,680
Speaker 1: and the knowing the affirmation on the illuminating serum is
1047
00:56:28,880 --> 00:56:34,160
Speaker 1: I give myself permission to glow because I just so
1048
00:56:34,360 --> 00:56:36,840
Speaker 1: many times we just or we stunt the growth, or
1049
00:56:36,880 --> 00:56:40,120
Speaker 1: we stunt the glow, or we feel embarrassed by the
1050
00:56:40,239 --> 00:56:44,239
Speaker 1: fact that we are, you know, bright, and or we
1051
00:56:44,440 --> 00:56:48,080
Speaker 1: to your point about the addiction to the negative, like
1052
00:56:48,200 --> 00:56:49,920
Speaker 1: if we are feeling good, how many times have you
1053
00:56:49,960 --> 00:56:52,719
Speaker 1: felt good but your friend wasn't feeling so good? So
1054
00:56:52,840 --> 00:56:54,680
Speaker 1: you kind of they might say, well, how are you feeling?
1055
00:56:54,680 --> 00:56:58,480
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm all right, but you're really actually great
1056
00:56:59,080 --> 00:57:02,279
Speaker 1: and you're actually glowing. And I think sometimes we dim
1057
00:57:02,560 --> 00:57:04,680
Speaker 1: you know, I know, we dim our light, which is
1058
00:57:04,719 --> 00:57:09,560
Speaker 1: another affirmation on the on the candle, is you know
1059
00:57:09,840 --> 00:57:15,200
Speaker 1: this idea of not dimming your light, like don't dial
1060
00:57:15,280 --> 00:57:19,320
Speaker 1: it back, you know, because we do it, and it's
1061
00:57:19,400 --> 00:57:22,040
Speaker 1: only because we don't we want to be kind to
1062
00:57:22,120 --> 00:57:24,600
Speaker 1: the people that were around. But I think there's an
1063
00:57:24,640 --> 00:57:28,280
Speaker 1: inspiration that comes from giving yourself permission to glow. There's
1064
00:57:28,320 --> 00:57:31,520
Speaker 1: the empowerment that a person looks at you and says,
1065
00:57:32,640 --> 00:57:35,040
Speaker 1: they don't they look like and I want to feel
1066
00:57:35,160 --> 00:57:38,000
Speaker 1: like that, Like I'm going to do more of that,
1067
00:57:38,360 --> 00:57:41,360
Speaker 1: you know, giving yourself that permission. I love that. I
1068
00:57:41,440 --> 00:57:43,240
Speaker 1: really it's a really special reminder.
1069
00:57:43,840 --> 00:57:45,880
Speaker 2: What are your go to rituals when you are having
1070
00:57:45,920 --> 00:57:51,200
Speaker 2: a day that it's just hard, stressful, tough, demanding. What's
1071
00:57:51,280 --> 00:57:54,760
Speaker 2: your go to, non negotiable set of rituals that at
1072
00:57:54,840 --> 00:57:57,960
Speaker 2: least you keys turns to when when it's really it's
1073
00:57:58,120 --> 00:57:58,919
Speaker 2: really tough.
1074
00:57:59,160 --> 00:58:03,480
Speaker 1: I definitely find that one of my go tos is
1075
00:58:03,520 --> 00:58:07,080
Speaker 1: for sure a meditation. Just find that I try my
1076
00:58:07,160 --> 00:58:09,960
Speaker 1: best to meditate frequently so that I do find that
1077
00:58:10,080 --> 00:58:13,480
Speaker 1: that balances you. You don't have to kind of fix
1078
00:58:13,640 --> 00:58:17,840
Speaker 1: what's happening. You find the continuity with the balance. But
1079
00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:21,840
Speaker 1: I do find that when I need it, I really
1080
00:58:22,360 --> 00:58:25,960
Speaker 1: I really relate to a meditation. It kind of just
1081
00:58:26,040 --> 00:58:28,600
Speaker 1: brings me back to the center. It brings me back
1082
00:58:28,640 --> 00:58:30,920
Speaker 1: to again that quietness. I get a second of quiet,
1083
00:58:31,120 --> 00:58:33,040
Speaker 1: even if I have to wake up before the kids.
1084
00:58:33,440 --> 00:58:35,440
Speaker 1: I'm gonna wake up at five thirty, so I can
1085
00:58:35,520 --> 00:58:38,160
Speaker 1: have twenty minutes of just like or I'm gonna make
1086
00:58:38,240 --> 00:58:41,640
Speaker 1: up at five forty five, whatever it is. And I
1087
00:58:41,840 --> 00:58:45,480
Speaker 1: really find that settles my spirit because usually if I'm
1088
00:58:45,800 --> 00:58:48,560
Speaker 1: having a tough one, I'm not sleeping well either, because
1089
00:58:48,600 --> 00:58:51,040
Speaker 1: it's just like the internal noise and all those things.
1090
00:58:51,360 --> 00:58:53,760
Speaker 1: So I really I really love the ground there. I
1091
00:58:53,920 --> 00:58:59,840
Speaker 1: will journal. I find that the journaling is also really again,
1092
00:59:00,080 --> 00:59:04,560
Speaker 1: I've always had to just kind of release things more
1093
00:59:04,760 --> 00:59:07,200
Speaker 1: freely than I find I can do it other people.
1094
00:59:07,720 --> 00:59:12,640
Speaker 1: So that really helps A really good workout. Key keep
1095
00:59:12,720 --> 00:59:15,440
Speaker 1: get me sweating, get me kind of like, you know,
1096
00:59:15,640 --> 00:59:18,560
Speaker 1: just like feel your power of your body. That helps
1097
00:59:18,640 --> 00:59:21,960
Speaker 1: me a lot. Then of course I'm going to wash
1098
00:59:22,040 --> 00:59:24,240
Speaker 1: my face. I'm gonna release. As we talked about, the
1099
00:59:24,320 --> 00:59:26,160
Speaker 1: Golden cleanser is gonna let me, like let it go.
1100
00:59:26,760 --> 00:59:30,240
Speaker 1: I have this beautiful, rich transformation cream and on it
1101
00:59:30,640 --> 00:59:35,440
Speaker 1: it says I welcome all circumstances as a catalyst for change.
1102
00:59:35,680 --> 00:59:37,040
Speaker 2: Wow. And so I can.
1103
00:59:37,080 --> 00:59:42,160
Speaker 1: Probably reflect on the fact that this isn't bad or good,
1104
00:59:42,320 --> 00:59:46,240
Speaker 1: this is just a catalyst to change something. And then
1105
00:59:46,280 --> 00:59:48,720
Speaker 1: I get my illuminating seramony because I'm going to be
1106
00:59:48,800 --> 00:59:52,600
Speaker 1: glowing and I'm giving myself the permission. And I do
1107
00:59:52,720 --> 00:59:55,160
Speaker 1: love a bath. I do love a bath. I do
1108
00:59:55,320 --> 00:59:57,520
Speaker 1: love you know. Back to the oils or the herbs,
1109
00:59:58,080 --> 01:00:01,439
Speaker 1: I find that even the crystal can come into play
1110
01:00:01,480 --> 01:00:04,760
Speaker 1: if I need to just kind of like release something.
1111
01:00:05,000 --> 01:00:08,080
Speaker 1: And definitely the intentions and the affirmations come into play,
1112
01:00:08,080 --> 01:00:10,400
Speaker 1: because I find that whatever's bothering me, I'll kind of
1113
01:00:10,760 --> 01:00:12,960
Speaker 1: it's something that's challenging me. Maybe I don't want to
1114
01:00:13,040 --> 01:00:15,120
Speaker 1: fail at something, or I don't want to I don't
1115
01:00:15,120 --> 01:00:17,800
Speaker 1: want something to go wrong, or and I kind of
1116
01:00:18,320 --> 01:00:21,440
Speaker 1: use that to say whatever it is that I might need,
1117
01:00:22,080 --> 01:00:25,880
Speaker 1: and you know, hey, sometimes it's just gonna be a
1118
01:00:25,920 --> 01:00:28,600
Speaker 1: hard day, maybe be a hard week, maybe be a
1119
01:00:28,680 --> 01:00:33,120
Speaker 1: hard month. But doing that consistently, I know I'm fueling
1120
01:00:33,280 --> 01:00:36,720
Speaker 1: myself and I'm pouring in there, and I feel better.
1121
01:00:37,520 --> 01:00:40,600
Speaker 2: What works for kids, Like what rituals do you feel
1122
01:00:40,680 --> 01:00:43,040
Speaker 2: you've actually been able to pass on because they're young,
1123
01:00:43,160 --> 01:00:45,240
Speaker 2: And I always feel like a lot of parents want
1124
01:00:45,280 --> 01:00:47,280
Speaker 2: their kids to do things, but I feel like you
1125
01:00:47,400 --> 01:00:50,720
Speaker 2: may be mindful in knowing what works and what doesn't
1126
01:00:50,760 --> 01:00:54,240
Speaker 2: and what do they like and what are they not Like.
1127
01:00:54,400 --> 01:00:57,440
Speaker 1: Well, I used to force Egypt to meditate. I was like,
1128
01:00:57,560 --> 01:01:01,520
Speaker 1: you want whatever you want, come men. That worked for
1129
01:01:01,600 --> 01:01:04,560
Speaker 1: a while. He's really big now and he's thirteen, so
1130
01:01:04,920 --> 01:01:06,520
Speaker 1: I feel like I could still kind of push him
1131
01:01:06,560 --> 01:01:09,520
Speaker 1: into it. But it was cool because he I think
1132
01:01:10,520 --> 01:01:12,600
Speaker 1: when I do my meditation, he can say every words
1133
01:01:12,640 --> 01:01:16,840
Speaker 1: Okan Genesis. And even though they don't necessarily do it
1134
01:01:16,960 --> 01:01:18,720
Speaker 1: with me all the time, they know it and they
1135
01:01:18,840 --> 01:01:20,800
Speaker 1: feel it and they hear it, and so I do
1136
01:01:21,040 --> 01:01:23,800
Speaker 1: think that idea of kind of like just sitting with
1137
01:01:23,880 --> 01:01:28,040
Speaker 1: yourself again is a great practice for kids because you know,
1138
01:01:28,080 --> 01:01:31,160
Speaker 1: it just has to be long, five minutes, cool, really quick.
1139
01:01:32,240 --> 01:01:34,479
Speaker 1: A lot of the times, I'm also I'm also talking
1140
01:01:34,520 --> 01:01:37,520
Speaker 1: to my kids a lot about gratitude. I think gratitude
1141
01:01:37,600 --> 01:01:41,640
Speaker 1: is the key key. It's the most simple but potent
1142
01:01:42,520 --> 01:01:47,640
Speaker 1: key to changing the energy. I know I felt times
1143
01:01:47,680 --> 01:01:49,800
Speaker 1: before a while I'm like, I'm just pissed off because
1144
01:01:49,800 --> 01:01:52,320
Speaker 1: someone did something, and I'm like and I'm sicking, I'm
1145
01:01:52,320 --> 01:01:55,919
Speaker 1: trying to do it and i am steaming, and I'll
1146
01:01:56,120 --> 01:02:01,000
Speaker 1: just like start to list what I'm grateful for. It
1147
01:02:01,160 --> 01:02:05,160
Speaker 1: changes everything everything. And I try to also share with
1148
01:02:05,280 --> 01:02:09,800
Speaker 1: my kids that you know, give thanks, give thanks, and
1149
01:02:09,960 --> 01:02:13,280
Speaker 1: also pray, make a prayer for what it is you're
1150
01:02:13,280 --> 01:02:16,040
Speaker 1: thankful for and what it is you're looking for. And
1151
01:02:16,160 --> 01:02:19,080
Speaker 1: I promise you you will open every door for yourself.
1152
01:02:19,120 --> 01:02:22,160
Speaker 1: I promise every time I leave the room. I older ones,
1153
01:02:22,240 --> 01:02:24,080
Speaker 1: sometimes I'll pray with them. Sometimes I let them, you know,
1154
01:02:24,200 --> 01:02:26,120
Speaker 1: be in his own zone and I say, don't forget
1155
01:02:26,160 --> 01:02:29,720
Speaker 1: to pray, like, don't forget, just be grateful and pray
1156
01:02:29,800 --> 01:02:33,760
Speaker 1: because the gratitude is like, it's key. I really do
1157
01:02:33,920 --> 01:02:39,200
Speaker 1: feel that it's a key ingredient to settling. And definitely
1158
01:02:39,200 --> 01:02:42,720
Speaker 1: it's a joy, which I think is what we're all
1159
01:02:42,760 --> 01:02:45,400
Speaker 1: looking for, absolutely right and joy.
1160
01:02:45,680 --> 01:02:47,320
Speaker 2: I love hearing what you're passing on to the kids,
1161
01:02:47,320 --> 01:02:49,080
Speaker 2: And I think so much of it is them watching
1162
01:02:49,120 --> 01:02:51,520
Speaker 2: you do it or them doing it with you. And
1163
01:02:51,600 --> 01:02:53,400
Speaker 2: I think you're saying a good example and that makes
1164
01:02:53,400 --> 01:02:55,760
Speaker 2: it easier because there's only so much you can tell
1165
01:02:55,760 --> 01:02:57,800
Speaker 2: a kid to do something. But if you're there doing it,
1166
01:02:58,000 --> 01:03:00,560
Speaker 2: showing up, turning up, enjoyed you.
1167
01:03:00,640 --> 01:03:01,240
Speaker 1: They get used to it.
1168
01:03:01,360 --> 01:03:02,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, they get used to it and they see that
1169
01:03:02,960 --> 01:03:06,680
Speaker 2: at least Mom values it. And you know, even their names,
1170
01:03:06,720 --> 01:03:08,720
Speaker 2: they're like Egypt and Genesis, Like I feel like those
1171
01:03:08,800 --> 01:03:09,880
Speaker 2: names are so powerful.
1172
01:03:10,240 --> 01:03:11,720
Speaker 1: Man, I love those names.
1173
01:03:11,840 --> 01:03:13,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, they're really powerful.
1174
01:03:13,320 --> 01:03:16,760
Speaker 1: Foo. I mean yeah, Egypt. It's been so cool because
1175
01:03:16,960 --> 01:03:20,600
Speaker 1: like even just as watching him grow and he's always
1176
01:03:20,680 --> 01:03:24,680
Speaker 1: been super into architecture and math, and I'm like, man,
1177
01:03:24,800 --> 01:03:27,960
Speaker 1: maybe that I feel like the name connection really brought
1178
01:03:28,200 --> 01:03:31,320
Speaker 1: that to him in so many ways, and and Genesis
1179
01:03:31,480 --> 01:03:34,480
Speaker 1: is like WHOA. I'm like, we might have needed to
1180
01:03:34,560 --> 01:03:39,160
Speaker 1: rethink name of that. But it's so good. He's so
1181
01:03:39,480 --> 01:03:43,680
Speaker 1: like kind of strong and clear, and you know, he's he's, he's,
1182
01:03:43,800 --> 01:03:47,800
Speaker 1: he's he doesn't you know, he doesn't bend. And I
1183
01:03:48,040 --> 01:03:50,680
Speaker 1: really appreciate that for him because I spent so much
1184
01:03:50,720 --> 01:03:54,160
Speaker 1: of my life bending and contorting and shifting and changing
1185
01:03:54,280 --> 01:03:57,920
Speaker 1: and trying to please that I love. And he's like, no,
1186
01:04:00,560 --> 01:04:04,200
Speaker 1: and he won't. That's it. I'm like, Okay, I'm go.
1187
01:04:04,200 --> 01:04:06,240
Speaker 1: I need you to try to be a little bit fluid,
1188
01:04:06,600 --> 01:04:09,280
Speaker 1: like a little fluid on occasion, not every time, just
1189
01:04:09,320 --> 01:04:11,680
Speaker 1: once in a while. But I love that for him.
1190
01:04:11,760 --> 01:04:14,080
Speaker 1: I love that he's clear. He's clear. And that's it.
1191
01:04:14,960 --> 01:04:17,919
Speaker 2: What's something you've been trying to learn recently or work
1192
01:04:18,000 --> 01:04:21,160
Speaker 2: on recently internally for yourself? The kids are work.
1193
01:04:23,360 --> 01:04:27,440
Speaker 1: I think I've just been working on just listening.
1194
01:04:29,480 --> 01:04:29,680
Speaker 2: Yeah.
1195
01:04:29,800 --> 01:04:33,000
Speaker 1: I think that we all have such big personalities. I
1196
01:04:33,080 --> 01:04:35,400
Speaker 1: think I feel for the kids sometimes like the dad
1197
01:04:35,480 --> 01:04:39,800
Speaker 1: has this huge personality, and we have this big personality,
1198
01:04:39,880 --> 01:04:43,960
Speaker 1: and I answer every question and I react to everything
1199
01:04:44,040 --> 01:04:47,800
Speaker 1: and I'm always saying yeah, oh yeah, And sometimes I'm like,
1200
01:04:49,400 --> 01:04:52,160
Speaker 1: I think I can just be more siglent, and I
1201
01:04:52,240 --> 01:04:54,240
Speaker 1: think I can just actually let me allow them the
1202
01:04:54,320 --> 01:04:58,200
Speaker 1: space to and everybody the space to just kind of
1203
01:04:58,520 --> 01:05:04,640
Speaker 1: feel share, say what they're saying without neither encouragement nor discouragement,
1204
01:05:04,800 --> 01:05:07,880
Speaker 1: just like see what they're sharing or saying and let
1205
01:05:07,960 --> 01:05:12,200
Speaker 1: them just speak. So I think the listening is really cool.
1206
01:05:12,320 --> 01:05:16,360
Speaker 1: Not always reacting, not always sharing, not always saying something,
1207
01:05:17,560 --> 01:05:22,360
Speaker 1: just like being more more, more silent, more taking the space.
1208
01:05:22,880 --> 01:05:24,920
Speaker 1: Just Yeah, that's what I'm working on.
1209
01:05:25,160 --> 01:05:27,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, I love that I can agree with you more.
1210
01:05:27,320 --> 01:05:31,120
Speaker 2: I think it's like it's such a rare thing actually
1211
01:05:31,440 --> 01:05:35,800
Speaker 2: for someone to actually just listen and not have a reaction, right,
1212
01:05:36,160 --> 01:05:38,920
Speaker 2: and for them to know that they can keep I
1213
01:05:38,960 --> 01:05:40,840
Speaker 2: feel like when you listen that way, people feel like
1214
01:05:40,920 --> 01:05:44,080
Speaker 2: they can actually speak from a deeper place. They're not
1215
01:05:44,320 --> 01:05:47,720
Speaker 2: just thinking and speaking, they're feeling and speaking because you're
1216
01:05:47,760 --> 01:05:50,439
Speaker 2: listening from a from a feeling space as well. Yes,
1217
01:05:50,960 --> 01:05:53,320
Speaker 2: and I wonder how do how do you explain fame
1218
01:05:53,400 --> 01:05:55,920
Speaker 2: to them or explain or do they how do they
1219
01:05:56,120 --> 01:05:59,360
Speaker 2: how do they interact with you? Said your big personalities
1220
01:05:59,440 --> 01:06:02,240
Speaker 2: but both of you have big lives, Like how did
1221
01:06:02,320 --> 01:06:04,840
Speaker 2: they make sense to me? Or are they still too young?
1222
01:06:04,880 --> 01:06:05,360
Speaker 2: And they don't?
1223
01:06:05,880 --> 01:06:08,440
Speaker 1: I mean they're pretty present you know, they're pretty present.
1224
01:06:09,200 --> 01:06:13,080
Speaker 1: I think about that often. I mean, I'm very much
1225
01:06:13,280 --> 01:06:18,960
Speaker 1: about I want us all in spaces that feel very
1226
01:06:19,400 --> 01:06:22,800
Speaker 1: very normal, Like I am very very like about that.
1227
01:06:23,640 --> 01:06:25,560
Speaker 1: I love to take them to their classes, and I
1228
01:06:25,640 --> 01:06:27,560
Speaker 1: love to drop my off at school, and I love
1229
01:06:27,680 --> 01:06:30,320
Speaker 1: to like we go and we go to the you know,
1230
01:06:30,400 --> 01:06:32,800
Speaker 1: we go hang out at the park, or we go somewhere.
1231
01:06:32,600 --> 01:06:33,200
Speaker 2: We do what we do.
1232
01:06:34,120 --> 01:06:37,640
Speaker 1: And I really love that ease. So I really want
1233
01:06:37,720 --> 01:06:40,200
Speaker 1: to put them in environments that feel like that. So
1234
01:06:40,880 --> 01:06:42,920
Speaker 1: of course, you know, at the other side, they're on
1235
01:06:42,960 --> 01:06:47,040
Speaker 1: the tour bus for three months and that's also different,
1236
01:06:47,520 --> 01:06:49,040
Speaker 1: so they I think, but I do think they have
1237
01:06:49,160 --> 01:06:52,520
Speaker 1: a pretty good balance about it all. And they're pretty
1238
01:06:52,640 --> 01:06:55,800
Speaker 1: like everyday kids, you know, And I love that about
1239
01:06:55,840 --> 01:06:58,680
Speaker 1: them too. I wonder how it feels or how they
1240
01:06:58,720 --> 01:07:02,040
Speaker 1: affect them. They're both very very empathetic. Like I know,
1241
01:07:02,160 --> 01:07:04,280
Speaker 1: sometimes if we're out and someone, you know, they might
1242
01:07:04,320 --> 01:07:05,400
Speaker 1: have caught someone and wants to take a.
1243
01:07:05,400 --> 01:07:05,920
Speaker 2: Picture with ma.
1244
01:07:06,640 --> 01:07:09,120
Speaker 1: Just take a picture of mom, you know, when it's
1245
01:07:09,160 --> 01:07:10,640
Speaker 1: the right time, I'm like, okay, cool. But if it's
1246
01:07:10,640 --> 01:07:12,840
Speaker 1: the wrong time then it's also But I'll go say hello,
1247
01:07:13,400 --> 01:07:16,320
Speaker 1: so happy to see you. Hope you're great. Thanks for
1248
01:07:16,400 --> 01:07:18,520
Speaker 1: saying hi. And it just might not be the right time.
1249
01:07:18,600 --> 01:07:22,360
Speaker 1: And that's okay too, So just showing them the boundaries too.
1250
01:07:22,680 --> 01:07:27,080
Speaker 1: And and but I think that, you know, sometimes sometimes
1251
01:07:27,120 --> 01:07:31,280
Speaker 1: I'll say, Genesis would be like, ma, you know in school,
1252
01:07:32,320 --> 01:07:36,720
Speaker 1: they're like, that's Alicia Keys. It's like so annoying. Mom,
1253
01:07:37,760 --> 01:07:38,680
Speaker 1: it is annoying.
1254
01:07:38,920 --> 01:07:40,600
Speaker 2: I feel you, that's annoying.
1255
01:07:41,600 --> 01:07:43,840
Speaker 1: But you could just tell him that's your mom. Like,
1256
01:07:43,960 --> 01:07:45,960
Speaker 1: you could just tell him, I know that's I see
1257
01:07:45,960 --> 01:07:48,080
Speaker 1: what you mean, but that's actually just my mom. So
1258
01:07:48,200 --> 01:07:50,320
Speaker 1: you can tell him that. And then and then each
1259
01:07:50,400 --> 01:07:53,120
Speaker 1: of them. You know, he's getting big and really strong
1260
01:07:53,200 --> 01:07:56,640
Speaker 1: in basketball, and he's like doing so many amazing things.
1261
01:07:56,720 --> 01:08:00,240
Speaker 1: He has a great instinct. And you know, really we'll
1262
01:08:00,280 --> 01:08:02,320
Speaker 1: walk into a room, will be me and Swiss, and
1263
01:08:03,120 --> 01:08:05,800
Speaker 1: if it's in the basketball universe, they'll be like, there's Egypt,
1264
01:08:05,960 --> 01:08:09,120
Speaker 1: Like they actually are starting to know Egypt's talent. And
1265
01:08:09,200 --> 01:08:11,320
Speaker 1: so it's really good and it's wonderful that he has
1266
01:08:11,840 --> 01:08:14,120
Speaker 1: all of his own space. And I think sometimes he
1267
01:08:14,240 --> 01:08:15,760
Speaker 1: might feel like that's.
1268
01:08:15,600 --> 01:08:16,000
Speaker 2: What I want.
1269
01:08:16,080 --> 01:08:18,040
Speaker 1: I want to make sure that it's not because of
1270
01:08:19,280 --> 01:08:21,720
Speaker 1: whatever else, you know, and so I feel for them,
1271
01:08:21,720 --> 01:08:25,720
Speaker 1: but I think that they're pretty cool about everything. They
1272
01:08:25,800 --> 01:08:28,559
Speaker 1: have a good head on their shoulders. You know, they're kind,
1273
01:08:28,640 --> 01:08:30,040
Speaker 1: they're loving, they're thoughtful.
1274
01:08:30,240 --> 01:08:30,919
Speaker 2: That's beautiful.
1275
01:08:31,040 --> 01:08:33,760
Speaker 1: I'm really proud of them, for all of them. You know,
1276
01:08:34,040 --> 01:08:36,719
Speaker 1: we have a beautiful, big, blended family, and I'm proud
1277
01:08:36,760 --> 01:08:39,240
Speaker 1: of all of them because it's like each has such
1278
01:08:39,240 --> 01:08:43,080
Speaker 1: a special, unique, cool personality and I'm just like, yeah,
1279
01:08:43,080 --> 01:08:44,280
Speaker 1: I was like, really cool.
1280
01:08:44,400 --> 01:08:46,160
Speaker 2: I love it. I feel like you've been able to
1281
01:08:46,640 --> 01:08:48,280
Speaker 2: you know, you've been in the music industry for so long.
1282
01:08:48,320 --> 01:08:52,120
Speaker 2: I mean I want to know how Hell's Kitchen felt
1283
01:08:52,880 --> 01:08:57,000
Speaker 2: like to be able to take parts of your story inspire,
1284
01:08:58,000 --> 01:09:01,920
Speaker 2: you know, to see your music on Broadway. I mean
1285
01:09:02,960 --> 01:09:06,680
Speaker 2: that feels like it was it a different challenge, Like
1286
01:09:06,840 --> 01:09:10,080
Speaker 2: what was what was the What was that like for
1287
01:09:10,240 --> 01:09:13,599
Speaker 2: you to have to go from recording in studios, making music,
1288
01:09:13,680 --> 01:09:16,920
Speaker 2: traveling to then doing Broadway? Like what did that look
1289
01:09:17,000 --> 01:09:19,320
Speaker 2: like for you? How were you creatively involved?
1290
01:09:19,600 --> 01:09:22,960
Speaker 1: It was definitely as you said, it's been a thirteen
1291
01:09:23,080 --> 01:09:26,519
Speaker 1: year process, and I think that's made it very cool,
1292
01:09:26,760 --> 01:09:34,320
Speaker 1: like really almost enjoyable, because whereas maybe sometimes with because
1293
01:09:34,360 --> 01:09:38,240
Speaker 1: it was such a passion project, I knew it wasn't
1294
01:09:38,280 --> 01:09:41,960
Speaker 1: all going to happen quickly or at once, and so
1295
01:09:42,280 --> 01:09:44,160
Speaker 1: I would be able to kind of take myself out
1296
01:09:44,240 --> 01:09:47,479
Speaker 1: of my quote unquote normal life and go into this
1297
01:09:47,640 --> 01:09:50,800
Speaker 1: workshop phase with Hell's kitchen, and I'd be able to
1298
01:09:50,840 --> 01:09:53,200
Speaker 1: figure out, like what, you know, what's the storylines? Me
1299
01:09:53,280 --> 01:09:55,640
Speaker 1: and the writer, the book writer would get to it
1300
01:09:55,720 --> 01:09:58,200
Speaker 1: and we'd say, here's the themes, and here's the characters,
1301
01:09:58,240 --> 01:10:01,599
Speaker 1: and here's the stories, and let's are to build this universe.
1302
01:10:01,920 --> 01:10:04,400
Speaker 1: And then when the director came in, Michael Grife, you know,
1303
01:10:04,560 --> 01:10:08,160
Speaker 1: he was really instrumental. He's kind of like that me
1304
01:10:08,240 --> 01:10:10,360
Speaker 1: and Chris Diaz, who's the book writer, are a little
1305
01:10:10,360 --> 01:10:13,519
Speaker 1: bit more than newbies. And then Michael Grive is like
1306
01:10:13,600 --> 01:10:16,800
Speaker 1: the like the parental figure. He's like, this is what
1307
01:10:16,960 --> 01:10:19,080
Speaker 1: we do. We do this, we do this, we do this,
1308
01:10:19,439 --> 01:10:22,600
Speaker 1: We're good. And sure enough we'd be like, wow, we
1309
01:10:22,960 --> 01:10:24,599
Speaker 1: needed that. We didn't really know where we were going.
1310
01:10:25,120 --> 01:10:27,400
Speaker 1: So he was like a beautiful guide in light. And
1311
01:10:27,560 --> 01:10:30,360
Speaker 1: then as time passed, you know, being able to connect
1312
01:10:30,360 --> 01:10:33,240
Speaker 1: with the public, theater, who who's the theater? Who did
1313
01:10:33,560 --> 01:10:37,760
Speaker 1: you know Hamilton and chorus Line and all of these
1314
01:10:37,840 --> 01:10:42,200
Speaker 1: incredible credible shows, even the softs they did, and you know,
1315
01:10:42,240 --> 01:10:45,280
Speaker 1: there's so many beautiful things that they that created another
1316
01:10:45,400 --> 01:10:49,479
Speaker 1: level of like clarity and just like refinement and really
1317
01:10:49,560 --> 01:10:51,599
Speaker 1: being able to bring it to life. So all these
1318
01:10:51,680 --> 01:10:54,320
Speaker 1: things kind of happen in pockets, like you know, it'll
1319
01:10:54,360 --> 01:10:57,519
Speaker 1: be a three week process and then we'll hold tight
1320
01:10:57,560 --> 01:10:59,559
Speaker 1: for It'll be a two month process, and then we'll
1321
01:10:59,720 --> 01:11:02,280
Speaker 1: hold tightenment, and then it'll be six months of just
1322
01:11:02,960 --> 01:11:04,960
Speaker 1: heavy and there will a whole tight a minute. And
1323
01:11:05,040 --> 01:11:08,280
Speaker 1: so it really gave me the capacity to hold the
1324
01:11:08,400 --> 01:11:12,000
Speaker 1: container for the story and for the meaning, and I
1325
01:11:12,040 --> 01:11:14,439
Speaker 1: would always be able to come back to it and say,
1326
01:11:14,720 --> 01:11:17,200
Speaker 1: this feels right or something's wrong about that. We have
1327
01:11:17,320 --> 01:11:20,000
Speaker 1: to figure that out. And then when we brought in
1328
01:11:20,080 --> 01:11:24,200
Speaker 1: the choreographer, she became another part of this beautiful tapestry
1329
01:11:24,240 --> 01:11:27,439
Speaker 1: you and she was creating movement around the songs in
1330
01:11:27,479 --> 01:11:30,320
Speaker 1: a way that I just never heard it before. And
1331
01:11:31,439 --> 01:11:34,000
Speaker 1: the orchestrator who's also been a partner to me in
1332
01:11:34,120 --> 01:11:37,320
Speaker 1: many ways musically, Adam Blackstone. You know, we would create
1333
01:11:37,400 --> 01:11:40,519
Speaker 1: different versions and instrumentals, and I wrote new songs, and
1334
01:11:41,000 --> 01:11:43,479
Speaker 1: so it was all these pieces and parts and you
1335
01:11:43,560 --> 01:11:45,920
Speaker 1: could start to feel little by little how it was
1336
01:11:46,040 --> 01:11:50,839
Speaker 1: all the right timing. But I feel like the biggest
1337
01:11:51,240 --> 01:11:53,280
Speaker 1: I want to call it a challenge. I'm looking for
1338
01:11:53,360 --> 01:11:57,880
Speaker 1: the right word. The biggest growth. Yeah, maybe the biggest
1339
01:11:58,240 --> 01:12:01,439
Speaker 1: The biggest growth or the biggest awake that I had
1340
01:12:01,720 --> 01:12:05,360
Speaker 1: with it was realizing that I could take this moment
1341
01:12:06,640 --> 01:12:10,719
Speaker 1: and I could almost take everything that I ever didn't
1342
01:12:10,840 --> 01:12:16,000
Speaker 1: do right and I could fix it. I could learn
1343
01:12:16,160 --> 01:12:19,040
Speaker 1: from it. I could take it the knowledge and I
1344
01:12:19,080 --> 01:12:23,280
Speaker 1: could put it into this process and I can fix it.
1345
01:12:24,560 --> 01:12:29,200
Speaker 1: I could do it right because I actually had the experience,
1346
01:12:29,880 --> 01:12:34,360
Speaker 1: and so my intellectual experience that I had gave me
1347
01:12:34,560 --> 01:12:36,720
Speaker 1: the ability to really look at it in a way
1348
01:12:36,760 --> 01:12:41,799
Speaker 1: that I had truly never had before. And then, because
1349
01:12:41,840 --> 01:12:47,000
Speaker 1: of that knowledge, really cultivating the strongest team of really
1350
01:12:47,640 --> 01:12:51,640
Speaker 1: awesome people in this particular universe to assist me as
1351
01:12:51,680 --> 01:12:54,280
Speaker 1: a newbie, you know, as a person who hadn't quite
1352
01:12:55,640 --> 01:13:00,960
Speaker 1: traversed this path yet was so inspiring and enlightening and
1353
01:13:01,200 --> 01:13:05,320
Speaker 1: empowering to really see that when everybody is the best
1354
01:13:06,120 --> 01:13:11,599
Speaker 1: at their field, you really can create something that truly
1355
01:13:11,800 --> 01:13:16,160
Speaker 1: is magical. And so I learned so much from it,
1356
01:13:16,280 --> 01:13:18,360
Speaker 1: And obviously that's been years and years and years and
1357
01:13:18,439 --> 01:13:22,519
Speaker 1: years and years, and even just seeing it off Broadway
1358
01:13:22,640 --> 01:13:25,200
Speaker 1: and having to navigate our way through how can we
1359
01:13:25,439 --> 01:13:27,920
Speaker 1: perfect the story? And there's still more to perfect, there's
1360
01:13:27,920 --> 01:13:30,559
Speaker 1: still more to craft. And doing that and being open
1361
01:13:30,640 --> 01:13:36,640
Speaker 1: and listening and really just being open too was tremendously rewarding.
1362
01:13:36,880 --> 01:13:39,720
Speaker 1: So that day when we got that announcement that we
1363
01:13:39,840 --> 01:13:46,160
Speaker 1: had been nominated for thirteen Tonies, it was freaky. The thirteen,
1364
01:13:46,280 --> 01:13:50,080
Speaker 1: the thirteen, it was just all like, something's really divine
1365
01:13:50,160 --> 01:13:55,360
Speaker 1: here and it was unbelievable. So it's been such a
1366
01:13:55,560 --> 01:14:01,880
Speaker 1: hands on I mean, I am notoriously anal but in
1367
01:14:02,000 --> 01:14:04,880
Speaker 1: the best most loving way, because I just I know
1368
01:14:05,000 --> 01:14:06,880
Speaker 1: what it's supposed to be and I'm not going to
1369
01:14:07,000 --> 01:14:09,040
Speaker 1: let it go until it's right what it's meant to be.
1370
01:14:09,400 --> 01:14:10,880
Speaker 2: Have you always been like that with all your music
1371
01:14:10,920 --> 01:14:14,080
Speaker 2: since day one and everything? Yeah? Yeah, it takes that. Yeah.
1372
01:14:15,400 --> 01:14:17,720
Speaker 1: And I've also learned how to like back off to like,
1373
01:14:18,000 --> 01:14:20,160
Speaker 1: you know what, let it let it flow, let it vibe.
1374
01:14:20,160 --> 01:14:22,240
Speaker 1: It's okay, you got to back off of it sometimes.
1375
01:14:22,320 --> 01:14:25,880
Speaker 1: But I am definitely smedge of a control freak.
1376
01:14:27,880 --> 01:14:30,760
Speaker 2: How have you walked me through how you've refined that perfectionism,
1377
01:14:30,840 --> 01:14:34,559
Speaker 2: because in one sense, the reason why you have sixteen
1378
01:14:34,600 --> 01:14:36,200
Speaker 2: Grammys and you know all the rest of it is
1379
01:14:36,280 --> 01:14:41,439
Speaker 2: because all the successes come from that level of work
1380
01:14:41,840 --> 01:14:45,080
Speaker 2: and ethic and effort and perfection and you know all
1381
01:14:45,160 --> 01:14:48,320
Speaker 2: of that like tinkering and iterations and and everything. And
1382
01:14:48,439 --> 01:14:52,040
Speaker 2: then where have you learned to let go or what
1383
01:14:52,240 --> 01:14:55,679
Speaker 2: is it that you've done to flow? At what point
1384
01:14:55,720 --> 01:14:57,519
Speaker 2: do you allow it to flow? If someone's listening, they're
1385
01:14:57,520 --> 01:14:59,160
Speaker 2: like a Leisha, I'm a perfectionist too.
1386
01:15:00,200 --> 01:15:05,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think that you know, definitely, having the vision
1387
01:15:05,120 --> 01:15:08,400
Speaker 1: for what you want to create is wonderful and you
1388
01:15:09,320 --> 01:15:12,080
Speaker 1: likely are the only person that has that vision. If you,
1389
01:15:13,000 --> 01:15:15,920
Speaker 1: you know, pass that off to somebody, the vision will
1390
01:15:15,960 --> 01:15:19,240
Speaker 1: shift right, so which might be needed at a certain point.
1391
01:15:19,720 --> 01:15:23,479
Speaker 1: But I think being comfortable saying I really have this vision,
1392
01:15:23,520 --> 01:15:29,320
Speaker 1: I'm very clear about it, and following that is wonderful.
1393
01:15:29,840 --> 01:15:35,080
Speaker 1: Then I think starting to let other special not just anybody,
1394
01:15:35,800 --> 01:15:40,760
Speaker 1: but special folks who you realize they they're additive. You
1395
01:15:40,880 --> 01:15:44,160
Speaker 1: know that what you create together or what they bring
1396
01:15:44,240 --> 01:15:48,759
Speaker 1: to the table can enhance the vision. It is important
1397
01:15:48,760 --> 01:15:50,519
Speaker 1: to let that in because if you don't let it in,
1398
01:15:50,960 --> 01:15:55,600
Speaker 1: you're going to actually steal from the vision ultimately. So
1399
01:15:55,880 --> 01:15:59,559
Speaker 1: I think that has been a beautiful process when when
1400
01:15:59,680 --> 01:16:02,160
Speaker 1: you and when you know that feels right, you know
1401
01:16:02,720 --> 01:16:04,600
Speaker 1: when it doesn't feel right and it's super hard and
1402
01:16:04,680 --> 01:16:07,519
Speaker 1: it's like a struggle and you argue and everything. Okay,
1403
01:16:07,560 --> 01:16:09,800
Speaker 1: it's not the right person. You can let that go.
1404
01:16:10,479 --> 01:16:13,680
Speaker 1: But when you do see that things or people are
1405
01:16:13,880 --> 01:16:19,200
Speaker 1: becoming additive, it's really good to allow that in, allow
1406
01:16:19,280 --> 01:16:21,920
Speaker 1: that to come in, and then you get inspired more
1407
01:16:22,080 --> 01:16:23,840
Speaker 1: and you're like, oh, I didn't know that we could
1408
01:16:23,880 --> 01:16:26,840
Speaker 1: do that. Now I could take that and make it
1409
01:16:27,760 --> 01:16:30,640
Speaker 1: even better because we've brought that part into it. So
1410
01:16:30,680 --> 01:16:33,920
Speaker 1: I think that's a really special part of the creative processes.
1411
01:16:34,400 --> 01:16:37,439
Speaker 1: And I have learned that with even songwriting, like so
1412
01:16:37,840 --> 01:16:42,000
Speaker 1: fun when you start to bring additional energies into the space,
1413
01:16:42,040 --> 01:16:43,640
Speaker 1: not all the time, so you lose sight of your
1414
01:16:43,720 --> 01:16:46,880
Speaker 1: vision or of your center. So that's happened to me too.
1415
01:16:46,920 --> 01:16:49,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, wait, let me go back to the simplest
1416
01:16:50,080 --> 01:16:53,840
Speaker 1: because I've made this a bit complicated or you know,
1417
01:16:54,080 --> 01:16:58,200
Speaker 1: overly done. But I think there's something really great about that.
1418
01:16:58,280 --> 01:17:00,400
Speaker 1: And then you keep seeing that it's growing and it's
1419
01:17:00,479 --> 01:17:03,839
Speaker 1: adding and then you can still hold space for division,
1420
01:17:04,240 --> 01:17:09,280
Speaker 1: but allow what helps it in and what makes it
1421
01:17:09,439 --> 01:17:12,160
Speaker 1: grow in and what makes it better in. And I
1422
01:17:12,200 --> 01:17:14,240
Speaker 1: don't think you have to be worried about that. It's
1423
01:17:14,280 --> 01:17:15,000
Speaker 1: a beautiful thing.
1424
01:17:15,360 --> 01:17:19,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, I've definitely developed so much more respect and appreciation,
1425
01:17:19,760 --> 01:17:22,439
Speaker 2: even more than I already had for artists. The closer
1426
01:17:22,479 --> 01:17:26,240
Speaker 2: I've got to the industry just from watching, because you
1427
01:17:26,439 --> 01:17:31,880
Speaker 2: forget that so many projects are truly pure passion and
1428
01:17:32,040 --> 01:17:35,360
Speaker 2: that they took ten, fifteen, twenty years. And when you
1429
01:17:35,479 --> 01:17:38,080
Speaker 2: hear about something like that, that you're saying for someone
1430
01:17:38,200 --> 01:17:42,480
Speaker 2: like yourself who's already successful, already has tons of accolades
1431
01:17:43,040 --> 01:17:46,000
Speaker 2: in an area that's directly related. But then to think
1432
01:17:46,120 --> 01:17:49,280
Speaker 2: you had to wait thirteen years and work for thirteen
1433
01:17:49,360 --> 01:17:53,760
Speaker 2: years to pull that off. You start recognizing that it
1434
01:17:53,920 --> 01:17:57,240
Speaker 2: takes so much patience and love, even when you have
1435
01:17:57,400 --> 01:18:01,280
Speaker 2: already proved yourself. Because I think, is this feeling that
1436
01:18:02,680 --> 01:18:05,360
Speaker 2: people can get tired of proving themselves or having to
1437
01:18:05,479 --> 01:18:08,360
Speaker 2: prove themselves. That's right, and it can feel exhausting sometimes,
1438
01:18:09,040 --> 01:18:11,799
Speaker 2: But the truth is that if you're growing and you're building,
1439
01:18:11,840 --> 01:18:14,400
Speaker 2: and you have something you care about, right, you're constantly
1440
01:18:14,520 --> 01:18:17,360
Speaker 2: having to prove yourself in a new space.
1441
01:18:17,360 --> 01:18:23,320
Speaker 1: Right, And I think there's there's something really exciting about
1442
01:18:23,360 --> 01:18:27,840
Speaker 1: that too, because I think if you could open every door,
1443
01:18:29,280 --> 01:18:31,720
Speaker 1: you would take it for granted. You know you I
1444
01:18:31,800 --> 01:18:33,360
Speaker 1: could open that door too, and I over that door,
1445
01:18:33,360 --> 01:18:35,880
Speaker 1: and yes, can we open every door? Yes, we actually
1446
01:18:36,000 --> 01:18:40,120
Speaker 1: can open every door. But is it always going to
1447
01:18:40,160 --> 01:18:43,200
Speaker 1: be easy or the simplest. No, it's going to take
1448
01:18:43,360 --> 01:18:45,240
Speaker 1: time and you're going to have to figure it out
1449
01:18:45,320 --> 01:18:47,560
Speaker 1: and work your way through it and come back to
1450
01:18:47,640 --> 01:18:50,720
Speaker 1: those places that you're like, oh, I gotta dredge up
1451
01:18:50,760 --> 01:18:53,000
Speaker 1: this confidence again, Like I thought I was good in
1452
01:18:53,080 --> 01:18:55,240
Speaker 1: this department and here it goes again. And all those
1453
01:18:55,400 --> 01:18:58,479
Speaker 1: learnings and challenges that kind of takes you through just
1454
01:18:58,560 --> 01:19:02,920
Speaker 1: being a human being is I think the beautiful part
1455
01:19:03,160 --> 01:19:06,120
Speaker 1: and the excitement and the thrill and the stimulus, and
1456
01:19:06,800 --> 01:19:09,560
Speaker 1: and then you're like, I am willing to work for this,
1457
01:19:09,720 --> 01:19:12,200
Speaker 1: I'm willing to put in the time for this. I'm
1458
01:19:12,240 --> 01:19:17,600
Speaker 1: willing to even fail. And what does that mean? What
1459
01:19:17,680 --> 01:19:21,639
Speaker 1: does it even mean? Actually, I don't know what that means.
1460
01:19:22,200 --> 01:19:24,360
Speaker 1: I am willing to work and to try, and whatever
1461
01:19:24,520 --> 01:19:27,320
Speaker 1: comes from it is going to be what I need.
1462
01:19:27,960 --> 01:19:31,720
Speaker 1: It's going to be exactly what's needed. So it's it's
1463
01:19:31,880 --> 01:19:34,280
Speaker 1: it's beautiful. I really I really enjoy it, and I
1464
01:19:34,360 --> 01:19:37,760
Speaker 1: really find that I'm more grateful than ever, for sure,
1465
01:19:38,120 --> 01:19:42,400
Speaker 1: for being able to spread my wings and be ceilingless
1466
01:19:42,600 --> 01:19:46,240
Speaker 1: or be edgeless, because I really want to be able
1467
01:19:46,320 --> 01:19:50,400
Speaker 1: to explore as much as I can, and it feels
1468
01:19:50,479 --> 01:19:53,960
Speaker 1: really good to keep trying. And and but most important,
1469
01:19:54,040 --> 01:19:57,080
Speaker 1: I think the seed of what you said is the love.
1470
01:19:57,680 --> 01:20:00,280
Speaker 1: It's what do I matter? If there's some that you love,
1471
01:20:01,560 --> 01:20:06,120
Speaker 1: go after it because it's meant for you and might
1472
01:20:06,200 --> 01:20:07,960
Speaker 1: not be the way that you thought it was going
1473
01:20:08,040 --> 01:20:09,680
Speaker 1: to be, or the length of time you thought it
1474
01:20:09,760 --> 01:20:12,240
Speaker 1: was going to take, or whatever all the other things are.
1475
01:20:12,840 --> 01:20:14,720
Speaker 1: For man, is I know it's meant for you if
1476
01:20:14,760 --> 01:20:15,120
Speaker 1: you love it?
1477
01:20:15,280 --> 01:20:17,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, You'll get to where you want in life,
1478
01:20:18,000 --> 01:20:20,519
Speaker 2: just not in the way you imagined it. The timeline
1479
01:20:20,560 --> 01:20:22,880
Speaker 2: will be different, the way it looks will be different,
1480
01:20:22,920 --> 01:20:25,560
Speaker 2: the way it feels might be different. Even how you
1481
01:20:25,680 --> 01:20:28,000
Speaker 2: visioned it may be completely different. But you get there
1482
01:20:28,200 --> 01:20:32,200
Speaker 2: right and the journey will probably be better and a
1483
01:20:32,280 --> 01:20:36,040
Speaker 2: better story than you imagined it to be. Ever, and
1484
01:20:36,640 --> 01:20:39,240
Speaker 2: hearing you said that is so so fulfilling. I want
1485
01:20:39,280 --> 01:20:42,200
Speaker 2: to ask you one more question before we end with
1486
01:20:42,280 --> 01:20:45,200
Speaker 2: a final five, and this question is more just the
1487
01:20:45,240 --> 01:20:48,000
Speaker 2: way I've experienced you even today. I'm like, you've been
1488
01:20:48,040 --> 01:20:49,799
Speaker 2: in the industry for so long, since you were eighteen.
1489
01:20:49,880 --> 01:20:52,840
Speaker 2: You said you know so much success, moved around, done
1490
01:20:52,880 --> 01:20:55,639
Speaker 2: so many different things, and I feel like anytime I've
1491
01:20:55,640 --> 01:20:58,000
Speaker 2: been with you, your energy is always like upbeat. You've
1492
01:20:58,040 --> 01:21:01,240
Speaker 2: always been positive, you've always been giving, like there's always
1493
01:21:01,240 --> 01:21:05,439
Speaker 2: been a really nice spirit and way about you that
1494
01:21:05,520 --> 01:21:08,599
Speaker 2: you have. And I feel like you've never become jaded
1495
01:21:08,680 --> 01:21:10,680
Speaker 2: by the industry or jaded by things around you, and
1496
01:21:10,720 --> 01:21:13,360
Speaker 2: you see that a lot for people, and not in
1497
01:21:13,439 --> 01:21:16,439
Speaker 2: a judgmental way. You observe it. But it seems like
1498
01:21:16,479 --> 01:21:19,400
Speaker 2: you've protected and carved out your space and your like
1499
01:21:19,520 --> 01:21:22,519
Speaker 2: happy place and your safe space. And I was wondering,
1500
01:21:22,560 --> 01:21:25,920
Speaker 2: how have you done that when so many people can
1501
01:21:26,000 --> 01:21:27,800
Speaker 2: look at something and be like, oh, well, I don't
1502
01:21:27,800 --> 01:21:29,160
Speaker 2: want to you know, people be like I don't want
1503
01:21:29,200 --> 01:21:30,600
Speaker 2: to be too Hollywood, I don't want to do to this,
1504
01:21:30,720 --> 01:21:33,040
Speaker 2: I don't want to go to that. But it feels
1505
01:21:33,080 --> 01:21:35,640
Speaker 2: like you've been able to protect yourself regardless, you know,
1506
01:21:36,120 --> 01:21:38,439
Speaker 2: being in a big thing, and I wonder how you've
1507
01:21:38,479 --> 01:21:39,920
Speaker 2: been able to do that and how you've been able
1508
01:21:39,960 --> 01:21:40,400
Speaker 2: to craft that.
1509
01:21:42,560 --> 01:21:48,760
Speaker 1: Ah, man, this is I love this question. I think
1510
01:21:49,000 --> 01:21:52,240
Speaker 1: that one of the back to the gifts of what
1511
01:21:52,400 --> 01:21:55,679
Speaker 1: I got from my mother. You know, she was always
1512
01:21:55,840 --> 01:22:00,240
Speaker 1: really kind of somehow she made me think about how
1513
01:22:01,320 --> 01:22:05,200
Speaker 1: I made people feel. And I remember that. I remember,
1514
01:22:05,520 --> 01:22:07,679
Speaker 1: you know, it'd be simple things. I changed my mind
1515
01:22:07,720 --> 01:22:10,400
Speaker 1: about going to a birthday party, and she would be like,
1516
01:22:11,560 --> 01:22:14,439
Speaker 1: but how would that make you feel? And so somehow
1517
01:22:14,600 --> 01:22:19,000
Speaker 1: she helped me to find my empathy and I can
1518
01:22:19,120 --> 01:22:24,160
Speaker 1: put myself into other people's shoes, and I really appreciate
1519
01:22:24,320 --> 01:22:28,599
Speaker 1: that was a gift. And so I can look around
1520
01:22:28,680 --> 01:22:31,519
Speaker 1: me and I can feel empathy for other people, like
1521
01:22:31,760 --> 01:22:35,680
Speaker 1: I want to connect with people I care about that.
1522
01:22:36,560 --> 01:22:38,880
Speaker 1: I love bringing good I want people to bring me
1523
01:22:38,960 --> 01:22:42,800
Speaker 1: good energy. I don't remember bring someone else anything else
1524
01:22:42,880 --> 01:22:46,160
Speaker 1: but good energy. Like I care about the energy that
1525
01:22:46,280 --> 01:22:48,880
Speaker 1: I cultivate in a space. And I also have learned
1526
01:22:48,920 --> 01:22:51,640
Speaker 1: that if I can't bring that energy, then I can
1527
01:22:51,760 --> 01:22:54,160
Speaker 1: remove myself from that space, Like I don't have to
1528
01:22:54,240 --> 01:22:57,760
Speaker 1: be in a space if I'm not feeling good, you know,
1529
01:22:57,960 --> 01:22:59,560
Speaker 1: because I can also not feel good. I don't have
1530
01:22:59,560 --> 01:23:02,960
Speaker 1: to always feel good either. That part was a lesson.
1531
01:23:03,120 --> 01:23:05,320
Speaker 1: Took me a while to get there too, you know,
1532
01:23:05,760 --> 01:23:11,200
Speaker 1: But I appreciate that I want to bring that. I'm
1533
01:23:11,320 --> 01:23:13,720
Speaker 1: conscious of what I'm bringing into a space and into
1534
01:23:13,800 --> 01:23:16,000
Speaker 1: a room, and I want what I bring into a
1535
01:23:16,080 --> 01:23:20,120
Speaker 1: space to be something that feels good. And so I
1536
01:23:20,280 --> 01:23:24,760
Speaker 1: think that that's kind of that's it. I think that's
1537
01:23:24,840 --> 01:23:28,280
Speaker 1: really it. And so just the distinction between the two,
1538
01:23:28,880 --> 01:23:31,280
Speaker 1: giving myself permission to maybe not feel like I can
1539
01:23:31,320 --> 01:23:35,000
Speaker 1: feel that space is great and then when I can
1540
01:23:35,160 --> 01:23:38,280
Speaker 1: and when I'm ready, I do. And that's what I
1541
01:23:38,400 --> 01:23:40,160
Speaker 1: want to do. I want to bring that, and I
1542
01:23:40,240 --> 01:23:41,920
Speaker 1: hold other people to that. I'm like, hey, I don't
1543
01:23:41,920 --> 01:23:42,800
Speaker 1: bring you that energy.
1544
01:23:43,360 --> 01:23:44,080
Speaker 2: I don't.
1545
01:23:44,360 --> 01:23:46,880
Speaker 1: I don't want you to bring me that energy, you know,
1546
01:23:47,040 --> 01:23:51,000
Speaker 1: because my energy is precious and it's important and it's
1547
01:23:51,040 --> 01:23:53,760
Speaker 1: special and it's just not free. I don't just give
1548
01:23:53,840 --> 01:23:56,400
Speaker 1: it to those who don't deserve it. So I also
1549
01:23:56,479 --> 01:23:59,160
Speaker 1: had to learn the value back to one of my
1550
01:24:00,200 --> 01:24:04,360
Speaker 1: gaps of who I am and what my energy is
1551
01:24:04,479 --> 01:24:07,080
Speaker 1: and what a gift it is to be able. All
1552
01:24:07,160 --> 01:24:10,080
Speaker 1: of our energy is a gift, and we can kind
1553
01:24:10,120 --> 01:24:15,240
Speaker 1: of choose how do we want to give it? And
1554
01:24:15,360 --> 01:24:19,040
Speaker 1: so I love that and learning when it's when to
1555
01:24:19,200 --> 01:24:21,599
Speaker 1: give it and when not to give it. It's also
1556
01:24:21,760 --> 01:24:24,200
Speaker 1: been a part of the journey too. I think I'm
1557
01:24:24,240 --> 01:24:27,479
Speaker 1: doing better with that. They go to better man, a
1558
01:24:27,520 --> 01:24:30,439
Speaker 1: lot of undeserved people, got a lot of good Alicia energy,
1559
01:24:30,479 --> 01:24:33,599
Speaker 1: and it's like, man, no more of that, No more
1560
01:24:33,680 --> 01:24:36,599
Speaker 1: of that. Like you got to know your limits, you know, like, Okay, cool,
1561
01:24:36,640 --> 01:24:38,000
Speaker 1: that doesn't mean I have to be on kind to
1562
01:24:38,080 --> 01:24:41,160
Speaker 1: that person, but they don't have to get my best
1563
01:24:41,280 --> 01:24:45,479
Speaker 1: beautiful energy. They can kind of yeah, hold tight over there.
1564
01:24:45,920 --> 01:24:48,639
Speaker 2: And you only realize that by giving it and knowing
1565
01:24:48,720 --> 01:24:52,360
Speaker 2: that you overgave or undergave right, right, And you only
1566
01:24:52,479 --> 01:24:54,400
Speaker 2: know that by trying it out. Like I know there
1567
01:24:54,439 --> 01:24:56,200
Speaker 2: are people in my life who I believe deserve way
1568
01:24:56,280 --> 01:24:58,720
Speaker 2: more better energy for me because they always have that
1569
01:24:58,840 --> 01:25:01,640
Speaker 2: for me, and right, maybe overspent in this area. And
1570
01:25:01,680 --> 01:25:04,320
Speaker 2: it's like looking at your bank balance at the end
1571
01:25:04,320 --> 01:25:05,920
Speaker 2: of the month and going where did I overspend and
1572
01:25:05,920 --> 01:25:08,080
Speaker 2: where did I underspend? And energy is the same thing.
1573
01:25:08,120 --> 01:25:10,600
Speaker 2: Where did I overspend my energy? And who did I
1574
01:25:11,040 --> 01:25:14,240
Speaker 2: overspend my energy with? And who did I underspend with? Fact,
1575
01:25:14,360 --> 01:25:17,000
Speaker 2: and let me reflect on that. I love that. Yeah,
1576
01:25:17,320 --> 01:25:20,000
Speaker 2: thank you, Alicia. I I've meant the first time we
1577
01:25:20,040 --> 01:25:22,479
Speaker 2: ever did the interview was only audios during the pandemic,
1578
01:25:22,920 --> 01:25:25,080
Speaker 2: and I remember, like, obviously, I mean, it's a no
1579
01:25:25,160 --> 01:25:26,960
Speaker 2: brainer that you have the most beautiful voice, but I
1580
01:25:27,040 --> 01:25:29,479
Speaker 2: remember just listening to you because we were so present,
1581
01:25:29,520 --> 01:25:30,280
Speaker 2: because I could just.
1582
01:25:30,880 --> 01:25:32,000
Speaker 1: Hear you, and it was a time.
1583
01:25:32,280 --> 01:25:34,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it was. It was a time, exactly, it
1584
01:25:34,320 --> 01:25:36,599
Speaker 2: was a time. But I'm so grateful to be able
1585
01:25:36,600 --> 01:25:38,880
Speaker 2: to see all your expressions today and just you know,
1586
01:25:39,280 --> 01:25:41,439
Speaker 2: see you come to life. And we end every on
1587
01:25:41,560 --> 01:25:45,000
Speaker 2: purpose interview with what we call a final five. Every
1588
01:25:45,080 --> 01:25:47,800
Speaker 2: question has to be answered in one word to one sentence.
1589
01:25:47,479 --> 01:25:49,679
Speaker 1: Maximum one word to one sentence.
1590
01:25:49,760 --> 01:25:51,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, but I'll probably ask you for more because I
1591
01:25:51,840 --> 01:25:52,960
Speaker 2: always break my own rules.
1592
01:25:53,040 --> 01:25:55,200
Speaker 1: All right, I'll try to be swift. I'm not get
1593
01:25:55,280 --> 01:25:55,519
Speaker 1: it there.
1594
01:25:55,600 --> 01:25:59,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, it doesn't matter. It's fine, Alicia Keys. These are
1595
01:25:59,120 --> 01:26:01,320
Speaker 2: your final five. So question number one, what is the
1596
01:26:01,479 --> 01:26:03,360
Speaker 2: best advice you've ever heard or received?
1597
01:26:05,680 --> 01:26:08,880
Speaker 1: Nothing before it's time, my grandmother, nothing before it's time.
1598
01:26:09,240 --> 01:26:11,160
Speaker 2: I love that one. Question number two, what is the
1599
01:26:11,240 --> 01:26:13,040
Speaker 2: worst advice you ever heard or received?
1600
01:26:15,400 --> 01:26:18,760
Speaker 1: The worst The worst advice that I ever received was
1601
01:26:18,800 --> 01:26:24,080
Speaker 1: that I had to kind of change myself to be accepted,
1602
01:26:24,240 --> 01:26:27,280
Speaker 1: or that I had to even if I felt uncomfortable,
1603
01:26:27,320 --> 01:26:30,600
Speaker 1: I should do a thing because it's what you know
1604
01:26:30,880 --> 01:26:33,640
Speaker 1: was going to be best received.
1605
01:26:35,120 --> 01:26:37,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's it's good to hear. I always like to
1606
01:26:37,360 --> 01:26:39,280
Speaker 2: make a list of all the worst advice everyone's had,
1607
01:26:39,360 --> 01:26:41,840
Speaker 2: because people are going to hear it again, right, and
1608
01:26:41,960 --> 01:26:44,200
Speaker 2: hopefully they'll remember this moment when they hear it.
1609
01:26:44,439 --> 01:26:44,599
Speaker 1: Good.
1610
01:26:45,120 --> 01:26:47,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, Question number three, what was it like to perform
1611
01:26:47,240 --> 01:26:48,479
Speaker 2: at the Super Bowl? Oh?
1612
01:26:48,600 --> 01:26:53,000
Speaker 1: Man, it was crazy. It was totally insane. This is
1613
01:26:53,200 --> 01:26:54,120
Speaker 1: longer than a sentence.
1614
01:26:55,400 --> 01:26:55,800
Speaker 2: It was.
1615
01:26:56,520 --> 01:27:00,559
Speaker 1: I found it so fascinating because it had to be built.
1616
01:27:01,040 --> 01:27:03,599
Speaker 1: The whole thing had to be built, and they had
1617
01:27:03,640 --> 01:27:05,960
Speaker 1: to time it in under three minutes. It could be built,
1618
01:27:06,200 --> 01:27:07,800
Speaker 1: and then we had to have our performance in the
1619
01:27:07,840 --> 01:27:11,040
Speaker 1: amount and it had to be and so and it
1620
01:27:11,160 --> 01:27:14,000
Speaker 1: was live. So it's crazy to see a live thing
1621
01:27:14,680 --> 01:27:18,719
Speaker 1: have to like operate in that level of like finite detail.
1622
01:27:19,320 --> 01:27:20,360
Speaker 2: I was like in awe.
1623
01:27:20,840 --> 01:27:23,040
Speaker 1: And then obviously the place and the people in the
1624
01:27:23,160 --> 01:27:25,599
Speaker 1: vibe and the energy and it was just like really fun.
1625
01:27:26,200 --> 01:27:28,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, here is that your dress and the piano and
1626
01:27:28,240 --> 01:27:30,400
Speaker 2: it was it was crazy.
1627
01:27:30,080 --> 01:27:34,120
Speaker 1: It was and the underneath the dress was the world's
1628
01:27:34,400 --> 01:27:38,639
Speaker 1: best puppeteers, So they were actually puppeteers underneath the dress
1629
01:27:38,680 --> 01:27:42,040
Speaker 1: to make it fly like that. That was fantastic.
1630
01:27:42,520 --> 01:27:45,040
Speaker 2: How did your control freak nature deal with that? Like
1631
01:27:45,200 --> 01:27:47,839
Speaker 2: three minutes and like the puppeteers.
1632
01:27:47,400 --> 01:27:51,360
Speaker 1: You know, I just we had practiced so distinctly that
1633
01:27:51,680 --> 01:27:53,760
Speaker 1: I knew everything that was going to happen and it
1634
01:27:53,840 --> 01:27:56,400
Speaker 1: was perfect, and I just kind of, you know, control
1635
01:27:56,479 --> 01:28:00,320
Speaker 1: freak until you can't. And as an artist, I just
1636
01:28:00,479 --> 01:28:02,640
Speaker 1: at a certain point when you're when you're flowing and
1637
01:28:02,720 --> 01:28:05,320
Speaker 1: creating and writing and saying, you do just have to
1638
01:28:05,439 --> 01:28:08,439
Speaker 1: like be in the moment. So the control freak part
1639
01:28:08,560 --> 01:28:12,599
Speaker 1: comes when I'm designing, creating the thing, But once I'm
1640
01:28:12,840 --> 01:28:14,600
Speaker 1: in the thing, you have to just.
1641
01:28:14,680 --> 01:28:17,000
Speaker 2: Go, oh, so that's beautiful. I love that. That makes
1642
01:28:17,040 --> 01:28:19,120
Speaker 2: so much sense. Yeah, it's a great clarification on the
1643
01:28:19,160 --> 01:28:22,040
Speaker 2: earlier point two. I love that, And that completely makes
1644
01:28:22,080 --> 01:28:25,080
Speaker 2: sense in the architecture, the design, that's what the perfectionistics.
1645
01:28:25,479 --> 01:28:29,280
Speaker 1: Otherwise though, it's like magic, whatever happens, whatever happens, it's
1646
01:28:29,320 --> 01:28:30,240
Speaker 1: perfect for that moment.
1647
01:28:30,400 --> 01:28:33,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's beautiful. Question before. What's the first offering you
1648
01:28:33,479 --> 01:28:35,400
Speaker 2: want me to use and the first offering you want
1649
01:28:35,479 --> 01:28:38,519
Speaker 2: Roddy to use? And I want you to give them
1650
01:28:38,560 --> 01:28:39,800
Speaker 2: to you now you can share them.
1651
01:28:39,880 --> 01:28:43,519
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, all right, well I want you both to
1652
01:28:43,640 --> 01:28:47,160
Speaker 1: wash your face, yes, but I want you to use
1653
01:28:47,840 --> 01:28:54,400
Speaker 1: the ora missed. It has rose, It has rose.
1654
01:28:55,040 --> 01:28:56,679
Speaker 2: I think we might start spraying this in the studio
1655
01:28:56,760 --> 01:28:58,160
Speaker 2: every time now someone comes in.
1656
01:28:58,439 --> 01:29:02,599
Speaker 1: And literally it just plows you instantly, and it's I'm
1657
01:29:02,640 --> 01:29:03,760
Speaker 1: as free as the air.
1658
01:29:05,160 --> 01:29:06,320
Speaker 2: That the affirmation.
1659
01:29:07,840 --> 01:29:10,240
Speaker 1: And you always are as free as the air. But
1660
01:29:10,360 --> 01:29:12,680
Speaker 1: that's just a beautiful reminder and my.
1661
01:29:12,680 --> 01:29:15,800
Speaker 2: Best friend, that's beautiful. These are to let me.
1662
01:29:15,840 --> 01:29:19,280
Speaker 1: Glow seerums, and this one, I think is the bronzeite.
1663
01:29:19,520 --> 01:29:23,120
Speaker 1: I give my felt self permission to grow the bronze aura.
1664
01:29:23,320 --> 01:29:25,679
Speaker 1: So she's going to get all three of these because
1665
01:29:25,760 --> 01:29:31,519
Speaker 1: she's glowing and she's so spectacularly authentic. I just adore her,
1666
01:29:32,160 --> 01:29:35,040
Speaker 1: So let me glow in all of the shades so
1667
01:29:35,160 --> 01:29:37,439
Speaker 1: that she could just like King King, Ching King King.
1668
01:29:37,920 --> 01:29:40,360
Speaker 1: She already glows, so we'll give that to her. I
1669
01:29:40,400 --> 01:29:41,280
Speaker 1: can't wait to see her.
1670
01:29:41,560 --> 01:29:42,880
Speaker 2: I love that. I can't wait for you to see her.
1671
01:29:42,880 --> 01:29:45,280
Speaker 2: As well. That's beautiful. Thank you so much. We're so excited.
1672
01:29:45,360 --> 01:29:46,880
Speaker 2: Thank thank you for sending so much for my team
1673
01:29:46,880 --> 01:29:51,639
Speaker 2: as well, everybody. We appreciate it, appreciate it so much.
1674
01:29:52,280 --> 01:29:54,880
Speaker 2: Fifth and final question, if you could we ask this
1675
01:29:55,000 --> 01:29:57,040
Speaker 2: every guest has ever been on the show, If you
1676
01:29:57,080 --> 01:29:59,720
Speaker 2: could create one law that everyone in the world had
1677
01:29:59,760 --> 01:30:01,360
Speaker 2: to what would it be.
1678
01:30:03,080 --> 01:30:05,600
Speaker 1: I think my law would be that you you, you
1679
01:30:06,400 --> 01:30:12,680
Speaker 1: cannot hurt another being. You cannot hurt them physically, you
1680
01:30:12,760 --> 01:30:18,120
Speaker 1: cannot hurt them emotionally, you cannot hurt them. You cannot
1681
01:30:18,400 --> 01:30:24,400
Speaker 1: hurt another another being. There's no reason, there's no difference,
1682
01:30:24,920 --> 01:30:31,960
Speaker 1: there's nothing that allows the physical or emotional or spiritual,
1683
01:30:33,920 --> 01:30:37,599
Speaker 1: you know, negligence or hurting of another being.
1684
01:30:38,360 --> 01:30:40,760
Speaker 2: And then that's a great law. It's a great law.
1685
01:30:40,800 --> 01:30:43,960
Speaker 2: And then we'd actually have to look at why we'd
1686
01:30:44,000 --> 01:30:46,200
Speaker 2: want to hurt others and where that comes from, and
1687
01:30:46,240 --> 01:30:48,080
Speaker 2: then actually her as well.
1688
01:30:48,320 --> 01:30:53,479
Speaker 1: That's that's incredible. I love that. That would be really
1689
01:30:53,760 --> 01:30:56,519
Speaker 1: amazing if we could look to that.
1690
01:30:57,360 --> 01:31:00,720
Speaker 2: It's beautiful. At least you kids, Thank thank you so much.
1691
01:31:00,920 --> 01:31:05,360
Speaker 2: I always happy when I'm with you. I've always enjoyed
1692
01:31:05,400 --> 01:31:08,160
Speaker 2: collaborating and if only I could sing.
1693
01:31:08,320 --> 01:31:11,800
Speaker 1: You know, it's a song, this is our song.
1694
01:31:12,600 --> 01:31:16,080
Speaker 2: You know. I'm so grateful and I'm so excited for
1695
01:31:16,479 --> 01:31:19,320
Speaker 2: people to use keys cull Care and have access to
1696
01:31:19,479 --> 01:31:22,719
Speaker 2: it and to transform their heart, their soul, their mind,
1697
01:31:22,840 --> 01:31:26,280
Speaker 2: and their body through this beautiful new offering and even
1698
01:31:26,320 --> 01:31:29,479
Speaker 2: the intentionality. I was looking at how everything's called an offering.
1699
01:31:29,560 --> 01:31:33,640
Speaker 2: There's no products. It's called rituals, not just routines. Like
1700
01:31:33,960 --> 01:31:35,840
Speaker 2: I love all of that to it, and I think
1701
01:31:37,000 --> 01:31:40,559
Speaker 2: I do believe that physical and I'll call them products
1702
01:31:40,640 --> 01:31:41,920
Speaker 2: just for what I'm trying to say, but I think
1703
01:31:41,920 --> 01:31:45,320
Speaker 2: physical products are so important to remind us of what
1704
01:31:45,439 --> 01:31:48,120
Speaker 2: to do internally. Yes, and we do them every day.
1705
01:31:48,240 --> 01:31:50,599
Speaker 1: We do call them product offering, so you can kind
1706
01:31:50,640 --> 01:31:53,599
Speaker 1: of like gel the ting together. But you're right, it's
1707
01:31:53,640 --> 01:31:57,920
Speaker 1: like the physical embodiment the embodying of the philosophy or
1708
01:31:58,000 --> 01:32:01,120
Speaker 1: the practice. And I love that and you live that.
1709
01:32:01,400 --> 01:32:04,719
Speaker 1: You guys live that. And thank you for this such
1710
01:32:05,000 --> 01:32:09,400
Speaker 1: such for these questions that also made me pause and
1711
01:32:09,720 --> 01:32:13,920
Speaker 1: think about how I wanted to share them. And I
1712
01:32:14,080 --> 01:32:17,080
Speaker 1: love this show. This show is so good. But you
1713
01:32:17,160 --> 01:32:18,960
Speaker 1: know that already because it's like a smash, so.
1714
01:32:19,080 --> 01:32:24,240
Speaker 2: What the world? Thank you for trusting me absolutely so much.
1715
01:32:24,360 --> 01:32:28,000
Speaker 2: It's interesting you too, Thank you big love, amazing. If
1716
01:32:28,080 --> 01:32:30,480
Speaker 2: this is the year that you're trying to get creative,
1717
01:32:30,600 --> 01:32:33,160
Speaker 2: you're trying to build more, I need you to listen
1718
01:32:33,200 --> 01:32:36,120
Speaker 2: to this episode with Rick Rubin on how to break
1719
01:32:36,160 --> 01:32:40,320
Speaker 2: into your most creative self, how to use unconventional methods
1720
01:32:40,400 --> 01:32:44,200
Speaker 2: that lead to success, and the secret to genuinely loving
1721
01:32:44,280 --> 01:32:46,759
Speaker 2: what you do. If you're trying to find your passion
1722
01:32:46,880 --> 01:32:50,240
Speaker 2: and your lane, Rick Rubin's episode is the one for you.
1723
01:32:50,760 --> 01:32:52,960
Speaker 2: Just because I like it, that doesn't give it any value,
1724
01:32:53,320 --> 01:32:55,720
Speaker 2: like as an artist, if you like it, that's all
1725
01:32:55,800 --> 01:32:56,439
Speaker 2: of the value.
1726
01:32:56,880 --> 01:33:00,240
Speaker 1: That's the success comes when you say I like this
1727
01:33:00,439 --> 01:33:01,840
Speaker 1: enough for other people to see it.
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